«
Expand/Collapse
Recent items
-
6:01 Lamu Calling
» african bullets & honey Word is out, the ticket is in hand, the speedo packed and the aspirin counted, I am going to The Kwani Literary Festival in Lamu from December 21st to 28th. What could be better than surf and sand and books and people who love them? Lamu from the tourist brochures is described as ‘hypnotically [...]
-
23:56
The foldaway house.
» AfriGadget Rajan Harinarain, a South African entrepreneur and inventor has come up with a temporary foldaway house for use in emergency situations complete with electrical wiring and fittings, doors and windows that can be erected by a small team in 5 minutes.
The patented structure weighs less than a ton, collapses to under a foot in height and can be modified with insulation/ventilation for hotter or cooler environments.
Links to the complete story at:
-
6:17
transvestites vs good hotel
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG coming to Brasil was to make sure i come out with an experience at the gay pub or street or whateve.
leaving on friday meant that i could go only on thursaday and witness the night life in SP.
Am not so much of a party animal and was wondering how i was going to rush through the nite.
but when we visited Beth, she invited us to dinner on thursday and i was torn in between.
Beth is a gracious lady and probably what i want to be when i grow up. Intelligent, she cheks her diet, dresses well and is ever elegant.
Lidia, he daughter, takes after her. Impressive!!
so i decided to go out to dinner and guess what, the best hotel in town.... nice food...tasty.
i would not however recommend it to my brother who thinks food is all about quantity not quality.
this hotel, i cant even remeber its name but its got a high ceiling making the room airly and the ambience perfect.
so, i enjoyed good food and good company, cant imagine hanging out at the gay pub and missing such an important dinner!!! -
claudia and becky
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
courtesy of Claudia, i enjoyed nice brazilian dish of pork, bacon and black beans, what in kikuyu we call `wairimu beans` rice and sukuma wiki though they have a local name for the sukuma.
the food was fantastic!!! -
corinthians neighbourhood
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
SP is a football rich city, with current brazil champions Sao Paulo, Pele´s former club santos and now corinthians. in deed today, Ze Roberto (bayern Munich) was on TV donating stuff at Santos, i did not know the guy is a preacher too......
i remember Roberto Carlos was quoted saying that if he retires from Madrid, he can only play for santos..... -
Corinthians FC
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
am not sure the stadium is well visible but thats where Edu, formerly of Arsenal now with Valencia, was playing. He was `discovered`by wenger in one of his many trips just like he found George Weah, Kolo Toure, Eboue and the like. -
beth, steve and lidia
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
by the time steve left SP 25 years ago, lidia was a toddler...... now shes married!!! -
beth, becky and lidia
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
i was happy to meet Beth and Lidia, from their office, i had a nice view of the Corinthians football club stadium -
Steve was excited to meet the gal, playboy gal. ...
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
Steve was excited to meet the gal, playboy gal. the men on the streets were amused to see me take the pix. am sure they knew we are africans and there is no playboy here. atleast not in kenya. -
at Avenue Paulista. One of the famous places. Th...
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
at Avenue Paulista. One of the famous places. Thats where most of that banks are.
-
9:19
Solidarity Journalism and Venezuela
» african bullets & honey Phil Gunson in opendemocracy.net on how the ‘political polarisation of Hugo Chávez’s “Bolivarian revolution” in Venezuela is reproduced in the way the phenomenon is reported and assessed’. More on the defects of “solidarity journalism”. The article kind of reminds me of the media reporting on Zimbabwe and Mugabe which often leaves me with the sense [...]
-
TANZANIA ENJOYS FRUITS OF CO-OPERATION
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG By Rebecca Wanjiku,
When Peter Ulanga was invited to visit Brazil, last year, he knew that something was going to change in the management of dot Tz country code Top Level Domain (ccTLD).
Ulanga, and a colleague, Peter Shilla, benefited from training offered by the Brazilian government on management of domain name registries using open source software.
Within two years of the training, Tanzania Communications Regulatory Authority is ready to launch the dot Tz ccTLD registry. The domain has been administered by the University of Dar es Salaam and individuals.
`The training worked well, we have bought necessary equipment and we are ready to launch Tanzania Network Information Centre, TzNIC,` said Ulanga.
Ulanga says that the training was useful and the tests were successful. He added that it will now be easier to register domains and if there are any problems, then there is a central point to channel complaints.
Tanzania benefitted from the south/south solidarity spearheaded by the South American power house. Kenya was the first to train on how to use the software, Tanzania soon followed suit, while Mozambique and Sudan are lining up for the services.
The gesture by the Brazilian government was calculated to ensure that Africa can access the less costly open source software solutions and transform African registries from manual to automation.
At the on-going Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers(ICANN) conference, in Sao Paulo, renowned Brazilian Professor Hartmut Glaser could not hide his joy while confirming that he had been invited by the Tanzanian government to witness the fruits of his government´s generosity.
Apart from the training, Brazil offered technical assistance to the recipient countries in case of any problems with the software or even any technical hitches in their operations.
The drive to foster south/south cooperation started in 2002 when Brazil sent engineers to Togo to train local counterparts from more than 20 countries gathered in Lome.
Ends -
Ann Rachel and Peter Ulanga from Niger and Tanza...
» REBECCA WANJIKU'S BLOG 
Ann Rachel and Peter Ulanga from Niger and Tanzania respectively. Rachel was instrumental in AFriNIC formation. she is my big sister
-
15:59
When I grow up I want to be a Kano Donkey
» Mama JunkYard's I don’t really want to be transformed into a four legged braying work animal but I have recently learned that there is Hausa phrase for foreigners who are fluent in Hausa; this being, “Ya iya Hausa kamar jakin Kano” which literatly translates to “he speaks Hausa like a Kano donkey.” Owing to the fact that ever since my arrival in Abuja I have on numerous occasions (at least six times in one day!) been addressed/spoken to in Hausa by many who have mistakenly identified me as a Hausa speaking Fulani woman I have decided to learn Hausa.
The security guard at work has kindly agreed to teach me a phrase a day. It is going well and I am further encouraged by two things. Firstly, there is no greater honour that can be extended to a visitor than treating him/her as if he/she was not a visitor. The least I can do to show my gratitude is to take steps to integrate with the people of my host nation and though there are over 200 hundred languages spoken in Nigeria I should not let this deter me from learning at least one before I leave. Secondly it has been brought to my attention that there are Hausa words that are similar to those that I am already familiar with as a result of my knowledge of (dare I say fluency in) Kiswahili. I feel like the battle is half won so why not go all the way?
So for anyone else who wants to join me in quest to become a Kano donkey; here is a list of English words with their Hausa and Kiswahili translations and who knows maybe there shall be an all Hausa blog soon.
- Twenty = Ashirin (Hausa); Ishirini (Kiswahili)
- Thirty = Talatin (Hausa); Thelathini (Kiswahili)
- Forty = Arbain (Hausa); Arbaini (Kiswahili)
- Fifty = Hamsin (Hausa); Hamsini (Kiswahili)
- Sixty= Sittin (Hausa); Sitini (Kiswahili)
- Thursday = Alhamis (Hausa); Alhamisi (Kiswahili)
*Learn to count and days of the week in Hausa.
-
0:03
Away!!!
» Memories, Sentiments, Rants and Raves Last time ...
http://www.rotaractmilimani.org/ssese2/gallery.swf
http://www.rotaractmilimani.org/ssese/gallery.swf
So finally Lady Luck is a behaving like a lady or the planets are aligned or God has heard my silent cry for freedom. Being a swivel-servant, its moments like this i truly long for, yes, am going on leave starting tommorow for 10 days. I had made travel plans but they have been deferred so am sad and all but what the heck. Been moaning and growling about the whole thing then i realize that the people i love to hang out with are on leave also during this jolly period, coincidinky! The itinerary is bum, movies, bum, sleep, visit,bum and bum.Till then my good people
-
9:40
Casino Royale
» Couch Potato Gaddamn Mocha and Egm, a brada can't ululate in finding the perfect avatar...I almost feel like bringing back Spidey
I actually avoided reviewing Casino Royale...especially since Ichiena was supposed to be my date...now let's get the review started right.
Verdict: Tsk! Tsk! Tsk!
so what is that supposed to mean?
For starters, I actually see why the chose to go the Daniel Craig Route. We expected them to replace Pierce and for him to compete with the likes of Sean Connery and Roger Moore...but in fact what they did was give us a whole new BOND.
And i dont think it's workin unlike Justin Timberlake's "I'm bringing sexy back-yeah!"
And this may have played to their advantage. It's hard having to replace a character...think Batman...from Keaton to Kilmer to Cage ...and now Bale. Even Smallville did the same for Superman. The secret nowadays looks like it involves..going back to the roots and beginning all over again. Cause this is what Casino Royale actually is James Bond-Episode 1. Hollywood has discovered this whole Episode 1 genre and using it to revive Bond. Worked on Star Wars as well.
is it me or does he look like Rock from Fantastic Four. Move over Chiklis!
Move over Halle Berry that scene is being re-done!
Instead of suave and chique! Instead of classy, majestic, debonair-we now have a BRUT!
A cold mean Brut! Who to make things worse wastes our time falling in LOVE! Damn it-BOND doesn't do LOVE! Bond doesn't succumb to emotions! He doesn't have to he is BOND, James Bond to say the least! That whole sequence irritated the hell out of me...and for hi to be duped like that-is now pushing it! Bond is smart with lots of cheek! Oh no they didn't play him out like that!
Many may argue that perhaps this is what made him casual in his future flames..i refuse! They wasted to much time on that love story the same way Superman Returns did with Lois and Superman flyin around. Many may say this is the side of Bond we never knew...that this is the initial Bond that IAN FLEMING had in mind...and as BORAT would say NAAAAAAT!
Honestly, the movie started with such a BANG! His two killings in black and white that made him a 00 agent-EXCELLENT! That chase scene with that black guy was outstanding especially the aerial shots...I was damn well near clapping...however the whole story line went downhill. Too much time was wasted in the casino! Not even Judy Dench could help it not crumble down. Though I liked the interaction between Bond and in her room...was hoping to hear M stands for a prudish name like Margaret...The torture scene was fantastic and you can see the Cheek in Bond come out
UNANSWERED QUESTIONS!
Where were the gadgets? Where was the shameless advertising and merchandising like in "Tomorrow never dies?" Remeber how almost every ad on CNN was to do with Bond...from the watch, car rental, BMW... The cars? Where were they? The many many Bond Girls? Q? (yeah I know the original Q died and John Cleese came at the end?) But for the sake off continuity...damn it bring back Q and MONEY PENNY! Where was the killer Theme Song? I mean all BONDS had significant theme songs!
So as much as this was going back to the roots to re-invent BOND! I don't think you can reinvent a product 20 movies down the line! You cannot attempt to change BOND yet have his old traits ooze out...
I think Craig will do one more Bond before the franchise slowly tapers off! Perhaps it will grow..but they have taken BOND in a whole new direction. Which the old audience may not appreciate! It is doing very well in the box office...but the truth will be out come the second movie!
To me James Bond is not a BRUT or a THUG!
The movie is definitely worth a watch especially on big screen. It was satisfyingly long but there was room to make this movie more than it was. It left us wanting more! It had had great start...lousy end! Amidst glowing reviews...nah this wasn't the best BOND for me!
-
Spiderman 3: The Battle Within
» Couch Potato Damn screw Pirates of the Caribbean( Ok I did not mean that) I cannot wait for Spidey 3.
That's all I'm saying!
More Villains...and who's the dude with the Black Spidey suit?
Now my new avatar combines Spidey's and Tato's
-
3:21
Charm kills art and I fear it has murdered in Addis Ababa
» african bullets & honey I was recently rewatching Evelyn Waugh’s Brideshead Revisited when a friend of mine, who is on a one-year writing fellowship in London asked whether he should move house to Oxford so that he could commute to London for his classes. Oxford, which is a city that I enjoy and like, is ever associated in [...]
-
12:14
"Embedded" in Iraq
» Marian's Blog Recently GOP "maverick"(?) Colin Powell labelled the reality in Iraq a civil war. Knowledgeable journalists and others say what we see in the press does not begin to convey how bad it is. It's almost two years since my Jan...
-
18:05
Measuring a Year
» KenyanMusings 525,600 minutes,
525,000 moments so dear.
525,600 minutes
How do you measure a year?
In daylights,
In sunsets,
In midnights,
In cups of coffee.
In inches,
In miles,
In laughter,
In strife.
In 525,600 minutes –
How do you Measure a year in the life?
How about love?
Measure in love.
Seasons of love.
525,600 minutes!
525,000 journeys to plan.
525,600 minutes –
How can you measure the life of a woman or man?
In truths that she learned,
Or in times that he cried.
In bridges he burned,
Or the way that she died.
Though the story never ends
Let’s celebrate
Remember a year in the life of friends.
Remember the love!
Measure in love.
Another year gone.
I woke up and thought about this year. What it has been about for me.
It fills me with peace sometimes just to think about my life, how it seems so crap at times yet I never stop to wallow in the mess.
That amazes, me I amaze myself. My spirit amazes me.
And what has been in this year for me?
I could be an ungrateful shit and say I have nothing to show for it, yet I know I have so much to show for it.
My friends, my family, and the things I have done.
I have taken risks.
Crazy risks that affirmed how smart I am, how blessed I am, how lucky I am, what courage I have got,
I have done things I never thought I could,
I have loved, I have lost, I have broken hearts, I have had mine messed with.
I have danced, I have laughed, I have cried a river,
I have been reminded what a beauty I am inside and out, what brains I have got, what abnormities I have, what a fantastic human I am,
I have wonderful friends, family that will bleed for me
I have watched my family get through another year, together, against the odds,
I have admired the courage and resilience of my beautiful, fantastic sister,
I have wept and prayed for the mistakes of my brother,
I have learned that parents are parents
I have found amazing strength, selflessness, regard for family, inspiration and sheer brilliance in another brother
I have watched my sweet cousin take up her mother’s burden, make it her own and excel at it. She is still excelling, she is still brilliant, she is still beautiful, her spirit will lead her to greatness I know, and she is my person of the year. She really is. At 19, she has dealt with more than any of us will deal with in a lifetime, and every time I look at her, in her quiet wisdom, in her amazing beauty and realize, I wish I had even half of her strength.
I have watched my cousin wed, laughed with my nearest and dearest and basked in those get togethers where everything simply falls in place.
I have found strength in my parents, my Ma and Papa, the wind beneath my wings and I know, if not for me, for them only, I live to make them proud
I have got through the year with one of my best friends away,
I miss her, I miss her, she knows me, she understands all the things I do, she knows the workings of my mind
Yet, I have been with my two absolutely fantastic girlfriends,
We laughed, got drunk, danced, got heart broken, laughed about it, cried about it,
They yelled at me, they rooted for me, they brought chocolate,
We grieved together for A's loss,
We grew up we lived, we worked, we learned
I loved
I found amazing love with an amazing man,
I love him.
I love him so much I could knit him a hat,
Yet I know, I fight demons,
That for all the things I do, one day, I might stand alone, surrounded my achievements or lack of thereof and by the people who warned me, who rooted for me,
And I will see through clear eyes, that I was never strong enough,
That this will really have passed me by
And all the things, the time I will have sacrificed to get there will pale in comparison to the warmth I feel in the place I find love,
I am perfectly aware, yet, I will sit back and hope, just this one time, I will be accorded the forgiveness due to me.
For the new friends I have made and lost, bloggers included
For everyone who checked on me,
The absolutely lovely Muts,
The gorgeous Ms K,
The I will die if I’m not funny , absolutely wonderful Nick,
The cool and fabulous Thinker
The Sweet Shiro,
The beautiful Nakeel
The cool Gish
The mad Kritik
The crazy Udi
The quiet and resourceful Bankelele,
The fantastic human being and wonderful friend Mental,
The ones I have not met
Thank you all, for the comments, the reading, the everything.
I have been so blessed, so lucky in so many ways that looking back,
I cannot think of a minute I was not living.
I cannot think of a minute to be ungrateful about,
I have grown up so much this year and in so many ways,
I have learnt more than I can recount really,
And I am grateful for all these things,
For the strides I have made, forward and backwards, they served to get me here,
For my friends, for my family, for everyone who crossed my path,
And I measure it all in love.
Happy holidays and blessings everyone. -
World Aids Day; Keep The Promise
» KenyanMusings Stop Aids, Keep the promise.
Sometimes it may look like 'that disease that afflicts other people', until you see a friend, a relative facing it, living it, fighting it.
That someone, is someone's son, daughter, sister, father, mother, brother, friend, relative.
Then it is closer home to you.
And you understand.
Its a battle that has to be won.
Every time I read statistics, every time I see numbers, I ask do I know anyone in those statistics?
I see HIV/AIDS statistics all the time.
And in those numbers, I can count, a child, a friend, a relative.
That is the power of numbers.
They may mean little if you cannot relate to them.
They may mean nothing if you do not know someone who falls into those statistics.
You should know,
Africa is home to more than 60 percent of the 40 million people worldwide with HIV.
In Kenya only, a few statistics;
**Remember these statistics do not account for those that have not been tested.
There are roughly 164 new infection everyday, roughly 60,000 new infections every year.
Sixty thousand!
1.27 million Kenyans are infected by HIV, half.....are women,
64,000 women have tested positive and need treatment, and again, this excludes those that are not tested.
39,000 children need Antiretroviral drugs (ARVs)
Out of the 263,000 adults who require ARVs, only 90,000 are getting them.
And every year, roughly 115, 000 people die of HIV/AIDS related illnesses.1.2 million children have been orphaned from HIV/AIDS- related illnesses.
1.2 million children. Do you ever wonder, who are these children?
where are they?
what do they do?
what do they eat?
what is the future for them?Sometimes I wonder what would happen if from today, this moment, there was never a new infection in the world. None. Not one. And it can happen.
Its about getting tested, together with your partner, every single time,
Together, because your partners status is not yours.
Its about being faithful, if not for your partner, then for health.
Its about being safe all the time, never letting your guard down, never getting lost in a moment,Its about living positively if you are infected,
Its about remaining negative if you are not infected
Its about offering love, support, care to those that are infected..abolishing all forms of stigma
Its about good governance,
Its about seeing the disaster for what it is and making a deliberate effort to fight it, eradicate it.
Be safe, get tested, stay safe, walk the walk with those that are infected, support them, help them live positively, care for and about them, accord them normalcy, because yes, it is a disease like any other, like cancer at the end of the day.
Its about a million things at once,Its about keeping the promise, Please, please, Stop Aids.
-
0:35
Bank eX Files
» bankelele 
I remember watching the X-files when it was the show to watch. The agents would enter a dark warehouse or factory. They would whip out their flashlights and find their way through an abandoned building, tearing down huge cobwebs, wiping away dust, and peering under covers in search of a deformed skeleton or alien foetus.
That’s one the last unpleasant tasks of a bank hangman which is what I was doing today - minus the gun, courage, cute co-worker, and aliens of course.
Today we did the same thing, starting with opening many padlocks at the entrance, covering our noses with handkerchiefs, removing any light-colored clothes and stuffing our socks into our trousers before we entered this warehouse. My handy Nokia phone comes with a torch which proved to be useful as the place is dark inside even at noon.
We have heard gallant tales and applaud the efforts to revive companies like Kenya Meat Commission. But this is how the revival all starts - with bank workers breaking down locks they had put up years before as we take yet another round of prospective buyers to visit/inspect the abandoned property before they submit any bids.
The skeleton these agents are looking for is not hidden. Even as we move through the dusty place with torches and noses covered to keep out the dust we are looking at the skeleton of someone’s dreams - the building which they put up, the new machines they imported from South Africa & India (state of the art then, outdated scrap today), the managers suite they decorated, faded door signs around the well laid out premises marking rooms like productions, manager, bathroom, sales office where people would busily work towards realizing the full potential of the owner's dream.
Today it’s just a skeleton. But if the buyer likes the skeleton enough to put some money down, someone else's dream & vision will rise again over the skeleton of someone else's.
Mlolongo: As we drove past mlolongo yesterday there was a bulldozer knocking down a controversial petrol station built on the road reserve. Further down the road other buildings marked for demolition were beehives of activity with work men doing more demolition work. The owners' of these building have heeded the government’s directive and are removing their buildings at their own cost, and with a chance to salvage their stone and material.
But many are not abandoning their dream projects; – they are instead only shaving off about 10 ft of each building that they deem to have encroached on the road reserve, and hoping the rest of the structures will stand on their own. I hope they will be proved right in their assessment because when the bulldozers are done, there won't be any ex-file's for the bank to revive.
December 1 opportunities
Telkom dealership: resellers for Telkom’s 3G wireless service (fax, voice, internet) in Mombasa, Kisumu, Eldoret, Nyeri, Nakuru, Meru, Muranga, Kakamega, Voi, Kisii, Kericho, Thika, Embu, Malindi, Nanyuki, Garissa and Machakos. D/L is 5/12.
Water distributors for Ha Ha drinking water, nationwide.
housing: Satellite City - a low cost hosing estate compositing 265 units will be built in mlolongo athi river
Jobs
Various jobs at abbott site
Chief executive (& secretary to the board) of the Association of Micro Finance Institutions (AMFI) . Apply to info.amfikenya@africaonline.co.ke by 8/12
Legal officer at Del Monte. Apply to nanasi@delmonte.co.ke 13/12
Public affairs officer at the Canadian high commission. Apply to nairobi-competions-concours@international.gc.ca by 8/12
energy company involved in hydropower and geothermal development: petroleum geologist petroleum drilling engineer, exploration geophysicist, financial analyst, financial auditor. Apply thru PWC at ess.ke@ke.pwc.com by 15/12
I&M Bank: apply online for cashier & teller positions.
Brand & communications manager at java. Apply to hr@nairobijavahouse.com by 13/12
Kenya Wine Agencies Ltd: trade marketing representatives, information & communications technology manager. D/L is 13/12
Ministry of State for Youth Affairs
- Section officer II (500 posts)
- Technical instructors (61 posts)
Apply to the PS P O Box 34303 Nairobi by 8/12
Postbank: senior manager marketing & business development, database administrator, legal officer, internal auditor, inspectorate officer. D/L is 18/12
Safaricom: retail centre manager (Nairobi), retail centre agent (Nakuru, Eldoret, Mombasa, and Kisumu). Apply to hr@safaricom.co.ke by 8/12
Senior economist at the World Bank - Sudan. D/L is 11/12
-
R rated movies of R time
» Couch Potato Dedicated to Patron Saint and Aco who is on the bilaz train. Patron saint had had an R rated encounter of late...
Back in the day this was as close to porn that we could get...the fact that they had running storylines was even all the whole lot greater!
Basic Instinct
oh yes! what a story line! what a duo!
Douglas had created a niche for himself. The story line was great.
Sharon stone was fabulous and we all remember that famous cris-crossing of her legs.
Grrrr Hrrrr Prrrr
Fatal Attraction
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, a jilted lover demanding strings after a one-night stand. Let no woman come between her not even a BUNNY!
Glen Close at her best!
Douglas again
Nine and a Half Weeks
Kim Bassinger had come a long way
Specialist
As Gloria Estefan's song said "turn the beat around...turn it upside down...get it get it up right now...the violins are moving to the nitty gritty...guitar scratchin..."
You remember the trailer ...Stallone...Stone...The Specialist
Fair Game
Cindy Crawford and her mole, and William Baldwin=Better believe it equals fair game.
No story line but....
Disclosure
Oh yeah Douglas you thought you had your game till Demi Moore turned the tables...didn't you feel like a piece of meat?!
Go Demi Go Demi Go!
Indecent Proposal
Demi Demi Demi...so for a million bucks would you sell off your wife?
Woody Harrelson, Demi and a very rich Robert Redford
-
4:34
Ghanian mechanics bring cars back from the dead
» AfriGadget The BBC Website carries a story about a Ghanaian mechanic called Frank Darko who claims that he can make any car from wrecks and scrap.
From the article:
Mr Darko is a “straighter” - so-called because he can straighten crooked vehicles.
He is one of an estimated 80,000 mechanics, engineers and artisans who work in Suame Magazine, an industrial slum, possibly one of Africa’s biggest.
Frank Darko specialises in straightening wrecked vehicles. On the outskirts of the Ghana’s second city, Kumasi, the Magazine’s origins lie in the city’s long history of working gold and other metals.
Over time, more and more of these artisans turned their hands to vehicle repairs and engineering, eventually moving to Kumasi’s Suame suburb after World War II.
In a continent and a country where buying new can stretch already overburdened pockets, the Magazine’s artisans show how far you can get with ingenuity, skill and a few mechanical tools.
-
2:15
Easy access to financing for MSMEs
» Startups in Kenya Micro, Small and Medium Enterprises have always had it hard when it came to securing financing for working capital or expansion. Although personal loans have become more available in Kenya; they are still targeted to employees only leaving out MSMEs. This is to change with the launch of Genius Savings and Credit Cooperative Society. With Genius SACCO it will be easy for MSME businessmen to access low interest loans of upto K.shs. 0.5m (USD $ 7,000) with monthly contributions as low as K.Shs. 1,000 (USD 14).
-
Desparate Housewives III:1-8
» Couch Potato 
After a disappointing second season, the show has returned fresh as the morning dew! Honestly this season has had some good laughs..Gabrielle is back to her sassy, almost bitchy self. She's always the victor yet the loser at the same time. Her one-line exchanges with her house-maid/surrogate mother of her child. Her feuds with Ricardo as they each try to out-do each other in hurting one another...each other out for the other's neck. Susan as usual has managed to get herself involved with some Brit! Edie's tentacles are sharper than ever. The Scavo's have problems of their own as they deal with Tom's Ex.
New twists:
- Bree's new husband the Dentist(go Dentist) has some sordid dark past intertwined with Mike Delfino who conveniently has retrograde amnesia. Si what happened to his wife? Why did he run over Mike and remember he had a PRISON connection in season 2?
-Now Bree and Orsen are made for each other with their cleanliness idiosyncrancies. Did you see Bree shudder when she had her first orgasm, she rushed to the E.R complaining of shortness of breath and what she described as a mini-stroke! I swear this season is laugh out loud!
-A pedophile has just moved into Wysteria lane.
-Julie is catching some different strokes with the new bad boy-Edie's nephew.
-Edie has moved in on Mike...remember that "carnivore" reference in season 1.
-Orsen's mother, played by Dixie Carter, a great actress remember her
from Differen' Strokes and Ladies' Man?
Disappointments:
-Looks like the writers never had any plans of writing in a baby for the Solize's
-Bree's son...is too quiet...or have they run out of storylines for him yet
-The whole Orsen story seems a little re-wound with the whole season one story line...but maybe it has potential.Enough with the murder mysteries...His mother,played by Dixie Carter, a great actress remember her from Differen' Strokes and Ladies' Man?
What makes a great show I always say is the development of good characters...obviously this is well cast show...but the humor is icy! Some serious quotes worth writing down! Worth every second of celluloid!
Summary:Knots Landing meets Melrose Place
Verdict: Season 3 has made up for a bad season 2...hopefully this time the Emmy's will be kind.
-
The Beatles and I
» KenyanMusings 
This morning, I woke up and started dancing to my Beatles. A neighbor nonchalantly asked me “what are you listening to?"
What?!!! Of all human crimes committed, that is one.Who asks about the Beatles like I would ask about one of these ‘people’ that sing nowadays. I know that statement just bundled me firmly where I long bundled my parents, but….I would only ask that if I heard something like “here’s my dick, hold it for me”. Then, I would ask, who dat is?
The Beatles?!!! *smh* Don’t disrespek (yes, I am confident my neighbor can relate to 'disrespek' as opposed to 'disrespect')
Anyway, I was walking down to the shopping centre and I run into this dude and it went like;
Dude: Hi, I have to confess, I was walking to Uchumi but I saw you and decided to walk to meet you. I think you look very good.
*smh* what can I say, it came with the genes. Issss just a lil baby phat phat!Me: Thanks
Dude: so I was wondering if I could have your name and number
Me: (to give credit, the man be fine. okay. He looked good and he was in shorts and sandals, and vile I’m a sucker for men in cool khakis and black Tee’s…just saying) My name is Christina.
The guy knows there is no way that is my name. Eti Christina. Chritine, maybe, Christina…Pfffft, how that?
Its weird. I wonder how men feel when they get told such lies. Like the guy in the club I told my name is “Imelda”.
I have nothing against Imelda, but I do not look even remotely close to one…, and I am shit at telling lies with a straight face. The next time I saw him, he came and said to my face like 4 times “hi Imelda”, and I was looking right at him before I went “Oh hi”, and I felt so shit that I told him “you know what, I’m sorry I lied to you, my name is “KM”.I haven’t lied bout my name since, I dunno why I did it this time. It was the safe thing to do.
Dude. I’m,(insert name)….awwww, halafu it was a cute, manly name. Nothing like Desmond, not that there is anything wrong with Desmond!! Are you not going to give me your number?
Me: Another time maybe
Dude: Do you live around here?
Me: Not really. I’m visiting friends. (another lie)
Dude: (Looks at me, smiles theeeeen, and here’s the scary bit) Don’t worry, I’m not going to kill you or anything.
What? Kill me? Duuuude!! that really is no cool thing to say. That is shite scary!!! Eish!! He might’ve used nicer words like I dunno, anything….who uses the word kill?Halafu it does not help that I have been reading this voluminous scary ass book Crooks Crimes and Corruption, its brilliant, you wont find it in Amazon you cool amazoners, bully for you!!!, tehehe!
It has these stories of sijui kina Jack the ripper and that totally weird Emperor Bokassa of CAR, yaani the man was plain mad. I was laughing when I read that story, it was not funny that he killed school children who could not afford uniforms he forced them to buy, obviously at an atrocious price and more importantly from the clothes company he owned, halafu he throws them in jail eti “ you wont need uniforms in jail”. Children!!!!
What was funny though was how much of a ‘forcist’ ‘jipoxer’ ‘insistor’ the man was. Tehhee, eti he used to call the French President “papa”. I give up.And theeeen, during his coronation, he had spent hours self sequestered, LMAO, I bet he was pacing at the mirror being all ‘queeny’ and things, watching re-runs of Queen Elizabeth’s coronation so that he can have one like that!!!! Negro Puhleeze!!!
Which he did, only that most people politely declined to attend when they heard the unreasonable and selfish ends he had gone to to make that happen like borrwoing I dunno, only 10 M pounds, halafu, the few that showed up were fed on “delicious” nyamas, of errrrm, the prisoners he had fattened in fresh air and good food. I doubt they knew what they were partaking in. Yiiikes!!
That book has all every single event that has happened in history, from Hitler to Catherine to Idi Amin to the Mafia to Jack the Ripper to Bonnie and Clyde to Count Lustig, the con who sold the Eiffel tower, TWICE. Twice Daddi (i like using that word, mwehehhe, if all only to piss snotty types off), Twice!!
Total absolute unadulterated coolness. I should be a detective, a con, a dictator, a spy, a swindler, a femme fatale, a murderer a villain.
End of digression/ wannabe book reviewist mode
So I was saying, I am a S.L.U.T for the Beatles. Waiiit, come back, I’m not that old school. I know I have landed myself into trouble with my friends when I want to listen to Beatles while they want to listen to ummm Mariah Carey *gags*. “looooove, takes tiiiiime, to heaaaaal when you’re hurting so much” **hand me a sick bag**
I know some of you cool people only know of Songs by the Beatles like “Let it Be”, sijui how “yesterday all your problems seemed so far away” and if you really try, “A hard Days night”, and you think you know the Beatles. *smh*, children of today.
Why don't clubs have like "Beatles Karaoke night" every effin day!!! That would be superfrigginfantastic!!Like do you remember how Carnivore Rock night used to blast "hard day's night" and kids, yes, would scream they 'have been working like a dog' and dance to it like it was all new and ughhhh, annoying pests vexxing me!! I will eat a child I swear!!
I’m sorry, I can sing along to no less than 50 songs by the Beatles. Word for word, with the little harmonies like ‘uhh’.
I will trade Morning sex for Beatles. Okay, I kid, but if I had to, I would be at crossroads. That, for me, is dilemma.My parents love the Beatles…and **looks around, sighs** Dolly Parton, LOL, yeah, my folks are uncool man, they pretend to be all cool and collected when I’m going nuts prancing around dancing to the Beatles. Mummy would prolly say something like "KM, could you please stop playing and do the dishes", tehehe.
Mother( I have always wanted to say that!!, Mother! Like some Brit Aristocrat! Like if my mother was being mean to my fiancé I would say "Mother!", and peace shall prevail you get? **sighs, I'm so on my own here**)Well, mother listened to the Beatles when she was pregnant with me, prolly singing to my father that ”You never give me your money. You only give me your funny paper”, teehehhe, but I got bit by that bug.
I love every single song by the Beatles, every single one. I love even the ones I have never heard, not that there are any. I have heard them all, and I am a happy camper.You hate them compared to how much I love them!!
Don’t you love how they have a song for every mood?
Like when you are really down in the dumps you go like “help me if you can I’m feeling dooooown. Pleeeeease help me”
Or when you have fucked up and dug so below the ground that you can taste the mud and you go like “Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da life goes on bra, la-la how the life goes on”.
Or when you are accused of evils against men and you sing “Did she understand it when they said,that a man must break his back to earn his day of leisure?”
** rolls eyes, yeah, duuuuuhhhh, he must. Is there any other way?
Man = break back. Period. What can I say? I'm spoilt.Or when blinded by *gags* love, you go like “Till there was you There was love all around, But I never heard it singing…I never heard it at all. Till there was you” *gags*, Beatles!!!, don’t be letting me down like that!!
Anyway, my all time favorite song has to be “when I’m 64”.
One time, after a year of my life I cannot account for or talk about, I was little, prolly 9, and that Christmas I was with all my family, and we all danced to that song.
It is really cool.
**Lotus, bullshit head**
It speaks about contemporary issues that men still grapple with. Like ummm, “If I'd been out till quarter to three, Would you lock the door” *smh*, men, but they never change, but they are so ambitious. Open the door at 3! I’m just saying….No honey, I’m sure there is a nice warm bed where your ass has been maybe perhaps?
Of my most prized possessions are thoughtful gifts I have received. I am that kind of person who ‘people like to give gifts” I do not know why, but I likey. I likey very much. Just to cover my end, I am not saying shoes, even those a size bigger, bollocks!!!!, books, jewels, clothes, chocolates, holidays, scents and ‘dolby sorrounds hook ups’ are not thoughtful.
I’m just saying that some of the most thoughtful things I have, are;
- My Birthday gift Beatles Collection, and
- The lip balm I surprisingly found in my bag when someone noticed that mine was cracked.
He exchanged the broken one for an exact same new one.
That sounds stupid I know, but the thought process that went into it chuffed me to bits. God knows I love the man but oh well.
Both times, I have sat down to steady myself, shed a tear and really, if I lost these things, if anyone takes my lip balm and Beatles from me, (picture KM holding the afore said items close to her chest and almost shedding tears as a bunch of bullies approaches her, sniff,) you might as well steal my soul, hook me up with a sack cloth and find me a corner on River Road to pass my days....just saying.
-
7:18
The American assassinations, part 2 - 1964, 68: Malcolm, Martin and John's brother Bobby
» Marian's Blog On the Web I found a photo taken in Washington, at Richard Nixon's January 1969 inauguration. A notation says ten thousand people came out in the cold for this event. Two thousand were protesters. In the foreground, above the crowd,...
-
5:08
Bring Back the American Draft
» african bullets & honey The question of whether we need a universal military draft will be important as long as this country is placing thousands of young men and women in harm’s way in Iraq. As long as Americans are being shipped off to war, then everyone should be vulnerable, not just those who, because of economic circumstances, are [...]
-
23:01
Post-Katrina, Cont'd: Let the People Rebuild - 2006 Harvard Jnl of African American Public Policy
» Marian's Blog For some strange reason we just don't seem to be hearing as much regular, in-depth news and information as we should about post-Katrina issues facing New Orleans, the Gulf Coast and the USA. So, we suggest you check the Summer...
-
Compare and Contrast-Movies:1
» Couch Potato As they say in Hollywood you never run out of ideas...then again sometimes good ideas or fresh ideas are realised and before you know it you have similar movies coming out at the same time. Similar especially in story background
This post is dedicated to and requested by Ichiena
So which did you prefer? The movie that I have started with was my better of the two.
A bug's life Vs Antz
A bugs life was just funny!
Saving Private Ryan Vs A thin red line
Without a doubt saving private ryan! Ive said it before i'll say it again!
War genre!
Sixth Sense vs Stir of Echoes
I see dead people! Not a bad flick....neither was Stir of echoes
But Sixth sense came first so...not to mention Bruce Willis was dead the entire time...cool!
Supernatural Genre!
Armageddon Vs Deep Impact
Killer soundtrack and Bruckheimer/Bay combo-Armageddon.
Meteor Genre! Earth Run!
Wild Things Vs Cruel Intentions
damn i loved both!
Kinky Genre! Grrrrr! Grrrrr!
LXG Vs HellBoy
uh...er... Superhero genre!
Scream Vs I know What you did last summer
I really enjoyed Scream1-3...not that it was scary but for some reason it gave good entertainment!
Teenage stars in a horror flick!
Underworld Vs Van Helsing
I actually dozed off in Van Helsing...yawn...Underworld 1 and 2 were not so bad.
pics courtesy of imdb.com
-
7:12
The American assassinations: John Kennedy, 22 Nov 1963
» Marian's Blog Today, Wednesday, 22 November 2006, is the 43rd anniversary of the assassination of John F. Kennedy, thirty-fifth president of the US. In the wake of yesterday's terrible, reminiscent shooting of Lebanese government minister Pierre Gemayel, so far today I've heard...
-
5:28
Craftsman Versus World
» african bullets & honey Matthew Crawford writing in The New Atlantis on why I should have paid more attention in wood- and metal-work class. In the age of think tanks, consulting firms, and IKEA, craftsmanship seems to be in decline. Shop class is becoming rarer, and our children are told that college is the ticket to an “open future” as [...]
-
4:18
Fernando Botero and Abu Ghraib
» african bullets & honey Fernando Botero is showing his incredible new paintings of the Abu Ghraib torture scenes at the Marlborough Gallery in New York. You can see more of them at Slate.com
-
13:21
The first Native American US president: Zogby opinion surveys
» Marian's Blog We will now have our first woman Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, but I still have a few unanswered questions of my own. As most of us now know, Nancy Pelosi happens to be white, Italian-American, rich, veteran...
-
Bollocks in order of;
» KenyanMusings Ughhh!! My life is a snowball of bollocks!! This is a bollocks week. I think I will eat a child to feel better!!
1. She failed at pretty hair.
I know this sounds retarded but how do those cool people keep hair and still manage to look like they have been skating on an ice rink?
Because, me, since I took out my locs, my hair has been subjected to contraptions that do not last a week because my hair is so light. I have had braids, then fancy braids, and some curly shite thingio at the top and an afro puff in a month and two weeks!!
This is CRAP.I know I should, nay, must, get my locs back, but Christ, the trouble to watch them loc again!!! I should be asking again, for the gazzilionth time, why please lawd did I take those glorious locs out?
Next, tehe, I’m getting a weave. Yeah, I want one of them horse hair thingies.
Yes, yes, I know they reek of fakeness-trying-to-be-Caucasian-mami-please-you are black-and-not-black-american-either-neither-are-you-Tyra-and-even- she-rocks horses-okay-that’s-not-her-hair-as-does-her-freind-Oprah-uuuuh-look-at-us-we-are-talk-show-hosts-and we-gat-cool-hair-give-me-a-break-okay-and-your-hair-is-only-rivaled-in-grease-stripping-by-sokoni-steelwool-so-get-over-it **gasp**, but yea, I’mma wear one.
Time to eat crow for all the times I have from the glory of my locs looked down upon women in horsie.
2. She dunno about Hire/fire
What is this thing about delegating halafu eti chose your team halafu someone has to ‘let go’ of the non- performers. They call it that, but really, its firing and me, I don’t have guts for that, yes I suck, because I want to be the nice guy. Feh! Who wants to be the bad guy?
Halafu, you how would you feel if they ‘have to down size” your rear.
Sigh, I wonder if they have dependants because I would rather stick a jagged knife firmly through my back anytime than deprive children of school fees and visits to row boats in Uhuru park.
Uh, oh, how to fire people with humor? Yeah, laughter is the best medicine see?
Boss: Knock knock
Employee: Who’s there?
Boss: Not you anymore.
Tihi. Not funny? Oh well.
3 She failed at domestication
Okay, first, yes, today I’ll go home early and make chapatis.
How that? **looks around to see who heard**
Like ok, my chaps range between crackers and cardboard right? I
swurr its jus the chaps, as in the finished good. **sighs, gives up**, but on the real, the dough is always soooo soft I could use it as a pillow, my, but if we could eat dough mine would bring all the boys to the yard!!, but the chaps are like from another mother!!!! Else I’m an exceptional cook. My story and I am sticking with.
And cooking is therapeutic when you done bad stuff right? So I’m going to make some cardboard chapati tonight and invite someone to partake in, then peer very very closely at his face. I’m better at reading expressions than at hearing lies.
4. She succeeded at binge and poke poke
So I went for my half yearly Well Woman check the other day. Trauma. They squeeze your tatas like they want to draw blood, theeen, poke, poke (repetition for effect) around your fore regions, *smh*, and insert this thingio, with a “you will feel some pressure” warning!
Pressure? Feeeeking pain!!!!
Uh, oh, I ran into my gynae in a club once **first to find a rock beneath which to hide**. Jayzuz!! These people should have their own “we probe for a living” club. How do you even say hallo to someone who put you in stirrups and lay you spread-eagled. Ahhh, but for loss of face haki!! And they are not even sleeping with you!!!!
Anyway, so I went on this shite pill and my appetite is shooting through the roof. Of course I’m glad. I weigh a misery 46.5 kg, I have the meat, it’s my bones that are light…and I thought this would be good to gain angalau a few kilos yawa so I can order my nephew around…..but I am fretting. I am eating all the bleeding time. And yes, I am waking up at night to eat. Ugali. Ugali. At 3 o’clock. What am I? Witch hunting?
In fact, if I have to be totally honest, that may be why I am making chapatti. Tihii, and my neighbor in shags who showed up all the time we had chapos!!! Ai, but to scrounge haki!! Halafu you reduce people’s rations. Eish!! who I would never have the courage to do that. I would feel like people were judging me.
-
17:51
Telkom Kenya Restructuring II
» Gathunuku Turns out local banks actually want to fund the restructuring of Telkom Kenya (see this story on EA Standard) but will lend KES 5.6 billion only if secured against the 9% Safcom stake the GOK is trying to offload. That 9% is worth at least double that KES5.6B and the GOK apparently needs Vodaphone’s approval to borrow on those terms.
Piece of advice Mr. Ndemo, take Vodaphone’s money. BBK, StanChart, StanBic and KCB are just being banks - trying to make money off you.
-
Leap Of Faith
» Mama JunkYard's Thank you to everyone, not only for the comments accompanying this post but also for the love, support, empathy, patience and friendship over the past month and a half. It is appreciated.
The Lancashire sea-side resort of Blackpool is home to an Eiffel Tower inspired structure imaginatively named “The Blackpool Tower.” Standing at 518 ft 9 in tall (158 m) the Blackpool Tower is a great place to view the Lancashire coastline. In particular one of the lower platforms contains a glass floor which, while not advisable for those who suffer from a fear of heights, is a wonderful way to see the streets below. The people and cars really do look like ants! When the Dr and I visited Blackpool we told that we must attempt “the leap of faith” i.e. jumping onto the glass flooring. I am not ashamed to admit that I fell into the “O ye of little faith” category – I did not jump!
With hindsight I realise that it wasn’t faith I lacked; it was courage and the “leap of faith” title attributed to jumping onto the glass flooring was/is a misnomer. A leap of faith after all is defined as the act of believing in something without, or in spite of, available empirical evidence.
In the case of the glass floor at Blackpool Tower; there is empirical evidence to support the claim that jumping onto the glass floor will not cause you to drop to your death. It may not be readily available but certainly the engineers responsible for the structure could provide a series of calculations that prove the glass floor could withstand the “jumping weight” of a human being. The idea that jumping on the glass will lead to fall straight through is nothing more than an illusion.
It was only recently, November 13th 2006, to be exact, a month and a day after my mother died that I truly understood what it means to take a leap of faith. Since October 13th I have been told by many people that “things will get better,” “it will be ok, just give it time, or “it won’t hurt so bad after a little while.” From the time I left Kenya, a week after the funeral, to return to Abuja I sought proof to support these statements. Reluctant to go back to doing the things I enjoyed and talking with the people I love because all they did is remind me of a time when mum was alive. A time that I could say that though my mum was in coma she was still alive, we could still see her, touch her and speak to her. Happier times. A time that had gone forever and would never ever come back.
So here I am writing this blog post. I don’t want to write it because with mum’s death came this invisible line that marks everything in my life. Things, events, people, everything seems to neatly fit into one of two categories: those before mum’s death and those after. For a month I have tip-toed on that line. Not wanting to interact with those things that fall into former category for the reasons explained in the paragraph above and equally not wanting to cross over into the latter because I feel that, in spite of all the messages of “things will get better” I am convinced that they won’t. Yet I am writing this post because I know that the line is nothing more than illusion. Irrespective of how I feel the world did not come to standstill on October 12th 2006; it was for all intents and purposes just another day, as was October 11th I am writing this post because even though I have no proof that things will get better; I have to believe that they will.
So this post here; this is my leap of faith.
Hopefully tomorrow this same faith will empower me to respond to the lovely emails I received….and to write a thank you post…and to do all those things that I have been scared to do…
-
8:18
People of color voted majority Dem, most Whites Republican
» Marian's Blog Here are statistics political pundits and others need to chew on. A Latino colleague sent me this NYTimes link to a fascinating exit survey on the November 2006 U.S. midterm House of Reps election. According to Edison Media Research Mitofsky... -
1:48
U.S. Midterms: "Appetizer for 2008" - Gergen
» Marian's Blog What was unimaginable less than 48 hours ago has occurred. Democrats have won both the House and the Senate while Mr. Rumsfeld has been shown the District line. Sayonara, Don. I couldn't have said it better than David Gergen on...
-
0:52
Hornsleth: Danish Artist and Ugandan Village
» african bullets & honey I have just stumbled into Mr. Kristian von Hornsleth, intrepid Danish artist known for audacious works such as the Fuck Me Daddy Bikini and his generally dark view of the art world and art lovers (see his poem, ‘FUCK YOU ART LOVERS.’) Now his war against global capitalism and consumerism (take a look at [...]
-
Mrs. Doubtfire
» Couch Potato 
There are comedies that come once in a life, this happens to be one of them. It's probably one of my best white comedies of all time. Each scene is laugh out loud and full of knife cutting remarks that a nanny that age shouldn't utter at all.
FUNNY AS HELL.SNORT GRUNT OUT LOUD HILARIOUS!
The annoying thing in this was seeing Pierce Brosnan in such a small role.
Some of the funniest moments were his/her boobs catching fire. Him at the employment agency with different routines. "BACK OFF !" as he hustled a hustler trying to mug him on the streets.
The subtle unseen middle finger to Pierce Brosnan
Killer Qoutes from this Nasty Nanny
-"Hello Dearie!"
-"Off your Mercedes, dear, you own that big expensive car out there? Oh, dear. Well, they say a man who has to buy a big car like that is trying to compensate for smaller genitals."
-"Sink the sub. Hide the weasel. Park the porpoise. A bit of the old Humpty Dumpty, Little Jack Horny, the Horizontal Mambo, hmm? The Bone Dancer, Rumpleforeskin, Baloney Bop, a bit of the old Cunning Linguistics?"
-"Oh I'm sorry, am I being a little graphic? I'm sorry. Well, I hope you're up for a little competition. She's got a power tool in the bedroom, dear. It's her own personal jackhammer. She could break sidewalk with that thing. She uses it and the lights dim, it's like a prison movie. Amazed she hasn't chipped her teeth."
-"it was the drink that killed him!"
was he an alcoholic?
"No it was the guiness truck that hit him!"
-
Informing the NSE public
» bankelele Read an article from the Washington Post where the Chairman on the US Securities & Exchange Commission, Christopher Cox, is intrigued by the idea of using blogs to disseminate important corporate information.
"A 2000 rule known as fair disclosure ended a long-standing practice of companies providing significant information to stock analysts and other Wall Street insiders ahead of the public."
Monday’s naked insider manipulation of Citi Trust shares should have been a wake up call for NSE on information and rules for prices and trades. Watch to see if there’s any recall or punishment stemming from the ill-fated trade.
This is very important because currently pension funds, Kenyans in the Diaspora, farmers and other new investors are all stepping into the market and things like the Citi Trust fiasco tend to undermine our confidence in shares. The share splits of EA Cables and ICDCI were self-fulfilling prophecies – share price shoots up about 6X in a few months, leading directors to announce splits to make them more affordable.
”when you attract foreign investors, you also attract criminals who specialise in economic crimes” – Tommy Prins of Deloitte
Related NSE needs EDGAR
New age for investors
The Nation’s Weekly Advertiser interviews the brains behind Eight.co.ke, Jijini Marketsand Stock Detective who offer financial information on activities at the Nairobi Stock Exchange. Pick up this weeks' free copy of the newspaper around town in Nairobi and hopefully the story will appear soon on their website. (ed: none are affiliated with the NSE)
Upcoming @ NSE
- Barclays Rumour: The Bank will announce a 5 for 1 share split and a 1 for 38 bonus. Note: I don’t own any Barclays shares
- Riba Capital tips on the next Mumias offer.
- Family Finance Building Society will offer 15 million new shares to account holders at 60 shillings each (minimum placement is 30,000 shillings). The ongoing offer runs to the end of the month and may overshadow the, rather low key, Eveready IPO (which starts next Monday) in the same way Equity Bank’s listing stole the limelight (and perhaps investor cash) from Uchumi’s re-capitalizations earlier this year.
Family Finance mimics Equity which also raised 500 million shillings in capital in August 2005. FFBS was expected to be a licensed as commercial bank by June 2006 but that has likely been delayed by the Central Bank until they shore up more share capital.
-
7:12
The real work begins, and what of Virginia and Montana??
» Marian's Blog After a decade-plus drought, on top of the House of Reps and so many governorships, the possibility of a Democratic Senate almost seems like too much to hope for. As Wednesday, Nov 8 dawns, the entire world awaits those two...
-
Casino Royale-Preview
» Couch Potato Fom last year I really wanted to start an anti Daniel Craig campaign-cammon, how the hell do you get rid of PIERCE BROSNAN!!!!!
So last week there I am in the theatre...and I see this preview. WOW! In black and white almost sensual and totally thrilling...the voice quite familiar drawing me closer to the movie in question...there you see Dame Judy Dench and without a doubt realise this is a BOND preview. For a split second...I'm excited...my mind has totally turned against me and I'm screaming "MUST WATCH THIS MUST WATCH THIS!!!!!"
and then....BANG! HE appears! Deflation couldn't be a better word to describe...not even that shooting withing that famous 007 circle did anything for me. He will do to this franchise what George Clooney did for Batman. This is the beginning of the end.
Worst thing about this review...is I am still going to watch the movie. Talk about double standards...but Daniel Craig cannot pull James Bond OFF! Heck bring back Timothy Dalton-the worst BOND ever before this...Timothy must be somewhere smiling that his ill-rep is no longer viable!
As Mojo Jojo would say "CURSES! CURSES!"
-
12:25
tHE mEDiCinEmAn aka The WebDoc
» tHE mEDiCinEmAn 
hmm...
This blogging thing, this. So busy so little time. It's been dog years since i last wrote a post. Enyewe, doesn't feel nice letting down ma-fans, so i thot i should spare a few minutes of my eve' and confirm that i'm still alive and well. And the post on my trip to Paris will be coming very soon, papa hapa.
The break i've taken is actually from the books. Leo we started our end of year exams, yawa! Aii, kumbe hayawi hayawi huwa... the last leg is here with us. It's such a pity i have tonnes and tonnes of readin to do, and it just doesn't seem to end. It was a cold morning as i sat down to do my Internal Medicine essay paper. Management of thyrotoxicosis, anaemia in chronic renal failure... I mustn't bore u, but it was ok. 10 compulsory questions, 3 long hours and one tired med student.
Right now, niko juu ya mbuku (books by the way) mbaya. Head trauma and jejunojejunostomies. Crazy stuff. Kesho is Surgery essay. Na pia there is an ortho question humo.. all that readin for one question? Med school!
Oh, and one last thing..
Got tired with the alias 'The WebDoc', now i'm fondly known as 'tHe mEDiCinEmAn'. Forgive the camel text, but i thought it's sort of "different" and unique.
Otherwise, keep it blogged.
Adios amigos,
tHE mEDiCinEmAn aka The WebDoc.
-
Bridgestone Exit?
» bankelele One theory for the massive volumes of Sanmeer Africa (formerly Firestone) shares traded at the is that Bridgestone is finally disposing of its 14.9% (41 million shares) it still holds in company almost two years after the partnership break-up.
-
Threesome anyone?
» KenyanMusings Filed under “Haiya!”
So, yesterday, a friend of mine tells me, eti the jamaa has decided eti, him, him he is tired of fighting for human rights and all, so he wants a threesome.KM’s immediate reaction, “Eyes-a-popping. And yes, my eyes are big, let it go.
Anyway, turns out the dude was not kidding seeing as he called to ask “have you thought about it?”.What a hyena!!!
No, he didn’t have anyone in mind, said Pinocchio but on the general, it’s a fantasy he would like to see come to life.The worst bit is she is so repulsed by the idea, she does not want to, yet he keeps insisting! Now that’s just plain selfish and disrespectful. If she does not want, she does not want. That would be a very easy decision to make. Go get stuffed!
Now this thing about fantasies right? Let me ask. You talk about them right? You say you would do them if they would turn your partner on right? But if it came down to it, bana!!! The logistics!!!Some are easy peasy. Like having a predilection for being spanked, hard fucks, gentle nipple biting….wait, is that fantasy or a way of life? Thin line. Thin line.
That is as close as some of us come to nurturing our masochist tendencies.
I may not take a whip to my rear really because, ouch, but there is something about spanking that says “I’ll make love to you tomorrow, today I’ll just fuck you” Just as well. Swiftly moving along then,So, this threesome thing.
I ran home and tried to trick the jamaa, Superman if you like, into fessing up. Yes, with bated breath lest he said yes, let’s do it tomorrow, but we could not seem to agree on whether he would want a MFF(Male Female Female) because obviously he threw politically correct crap at me like, ‘hell no, I cannot stand another person, man or woman touching my woman’…..to “I would do it if it would really turn you on, but you are all the woman I want and need”. Muppet! (Mental 2006). The man just be fronting. Pretending to be the sacrificial lamb eti “if it would turn you on, I will suffer through it and have a threesome” and I know;
He would trip over a stool.
Break a foot.
Running to participate.
If the event arose.
Then I asked about a MMF (Male Male female)…ummm, that was a very interesting discussion, but yeah, he is not qualified to give opinions on this threesome thing. His thinking process is flawed.I dunno. I really don’t.
I, for one, might smile and wave over a threesome lakini that mama would have to polish herself up because NO WAY my man is touching her.
What? Are you smoking grass?
And neither would I go down on her. Yes, I know it will do nothing to helf me solve the mystery of what pussy feels like in the mouth.
I hear is as soft and luxurious as salmon. I dunno, that’s what I heard.
I know what it (mine) tastes like. I have my ways, but it would be awesome to scan your kitty and lick it wouldn’t it? Narcissistic? I know.But moving straight along, the logistics of a vagina (herein referred to as salmon), you can go down on really? A nice, neat, happy, clean, healthy salmon. Then maybe I can wrap my mind about eating salmon.
So, yeah, I can talk smack about threesomes, chest thump even, lakini aiiii. Ok, maybe I would kiss her and suck on her tits right? Tits are cool, I have nothing against tits, but seriously??!!!And then there is the issue of me being extremely possessive and all.
I cannot even stand to see a random woman talking to my boyfriend. I don't smile, I don't wave. If I do not know who she is to him, my natural instinct, repressed of course because that is what restraint is about, is to give that woman a wedgie, stuff her bag into her mouth and tell her to git gone!! I mean, what if she is telling him stuff like “baby, you wanna fuck?”, seeing as I’m not within earshot and all, yes, those thoughts cross my mind, and yes, I know they might be saving the world so let it go okay?So, me, the woman who if I had my way would stuff my man into a brown plastic bag, yes with holes to breathe- What? I’m not homicidal, and a few rations of food then lug him around.
Me, that girl, how do I even begin to wrap my mind about threesome? Another woman? Stop jokos (Udi 2006).
Then there would be the issue of designated roles;
-Who would choose the third party?
Let me just say, if it was left to me to pick the other female, in the interest of playing saboteur and all, I would bring you something you cannot tap even with a 2 inch thick blindfold. ‘Something the cat dragged in’ would cease to be an expression as you know it. I’m just saying
- What would be each parties designated role be?
In my head, the woman would not touch, suck, kiss, or come near anything, but, that’s just me. She would be reduced to a mere onlooker really.Halafu, and here is the traumatizing part right?
What if your jamaa starts going at it with that mama with that look of ‘this rocks’ on his face and you are left wondering ala! Si me I’m the mama? Si I thought I own those goods wholly and exclusively” How now?
Can you spell Coitus interruptus?
Stick a knife thro my back or tell me to date a man who has never played rugby any day please thank you.
That threesome stays firmly entrenched in our heads, because in all truth, I see myself standing over 2 dead bodies with a bloody knife in my hand screaming “I thought I said stop!”
I think what saddens me about my friend’s hyena boyfriend. Yes, what a hyena, is the fact that of course, of course she should be allowed to say no if she is not comfortable with it. You don’t force someone to do that stuff. That is no different from rape!
For me, really, that is the stuff you talk about but if it came to doing it, you would have to consider what kind of relationship you have, would it strengthen you or leave you in a jealous fit and if you could sincerely stand seeing someone else within your partner’s peripheral vision.
Halafu, kwani she is not enough? Me, if my one woman freak show is not enough for you, haiya, go watch girl and girl porn and leave me alone.
I’m utopian like this right? I wouldn’t expect the man I love to seriously ask me to do it if I was uncomfortable with it. I like to think that two straight people can complete each other in all rational ways in bed. I like to think words like “baby, would you like to f*** me while another woman (insert evil of choice)” is not taken at face value.Share my man? No way Jose.
And in the same breath, in the interest of fairness, how do men feel if a woman asked for a MMF?
Its funny, men are not very receptive to a MMF, the same way most, not all, men tend to be repulsed by Gays yet pitch tents for lesbians.
Sorry, I’m already hyperventilating (not in a good way) at the thought of an MMF, but knowing men and their egos, that would be downright messy.
First, they would be trying ‘go first’, then to outdo each other at your expense. You would be the sore (pun fully intended) loser in that one.Then there would be the guy who would go home sulking because maybe he is less endowed, in size and skill, and God forbid if that man was your dude, well, not mine I'm just saying, because you would spend years in shrinkage (no pun there) mending a very very bruised esteem.
If it’s MMF, it’s a blow, beneath the belt if I should mention, to a man’s ego and perceived ability to satisfy a woman. But noooo, when it’s the MFF, its okay because, men are turned on by the whole lesbo thing.I dunno. Hell, I would think the man did not love or respect me enough if he asked me to do it. And still yet, to totally contradict myself, I might want to do it but really, it’s all a blur. You want to keep the intimacy between you and the person you love and you want to experiment…Maybe with someone I was not in love with, maybe with someone I trust enough to be that adventurous with. I dunno. I just don’t.
But I am the prude. Would you do it?
-
No alcohol thanks,
» KenyanMusings Seriously, I disgust myself. I do.
I am never drinking again!! I know I said that after last office party at Christmas last year, but, eiiishhh.Thing is, my body is not very well equipped to handle vast amounts of alcohol…and I hate, totally loathe the feeling of drunk and out of control.
I cannot have more than 3 beers in a night.
Yes, I consume shots and concoctions too, but on the general, I am very unpleasant to be around when I am drunk.
I sleep, I rant, I wanna go home now!!! I wanna gag, I wanna lie down for just a minute..people piss me off. Ughhhh! And then there is the unpleasantness of just being unable to control yourself that bothers me.For me, it starts with the inability to hold a drink in my mouth.
I spurt (euuugh) it out when I laugh, grossly disgusting, please God!
And I know, if I keep drinking more, I’m going to be in funk. That’s my cue to switch to water and to dance. With someone I know. Don’t you just hate dancing with people you do not know?. Sheesh, you dunno their scent, its weird, they stick their crotch into your ass, Why oh why do people do that? Yukk.
Yeah, so the spurt is my signature move. Some people start to slur and philosophize. Dude, you can’t be a slurring philosopher…and they are speaking CRAP by the way. CRAP. (I hate drunk slurrers. It’s so tiring to listen to people think/doze before they can speak).Uh, oh, some switch accents. One minute you are sitting with this ‘cool’ person, with this Brit accent to go, and halfway into the evening, he/she is spitting kikuyu and kikuenglish like Njenga Karume, and you sit there thinking. What the….!!!
Teheheh, I like to laugh at such people. No, really, I laugh at people in their face.Uh, and the ones who cannot walk in their heels/ broken heels/sling shoes over their shoulders and walk to the car barefoot kinds. I totally love those; I may have been a victim of that. Maybe. Perhaps. Parking lots are littered with those. I like to be watching that drama. Not be in the drama!!!
Tihiii, don’t you just love it when you are tipsy. Just right. A little tipsy and horny, and funny, and pretty and sexy and you dance and guess what, you feet hold their own, ah! That’s the best place to be.
Not the kind of drunk where one minute you are conversing and the next you are flat out blacked out!! Ama you are stepping on people and falling over them on the dance floor!!So anyway, I did get drunk. Very. I know I drank not less than 6 different drinks, in colossal amounts. I drank wine from a box too. A box!! Could I be any more of loser?
And I drank some ‘dawas’ my cousin made (her version of, she got the recipe online and they kinda taste like Carni ones, she even puts those R(B)amboo dawa sticks thingies) ….very yumm.
And I drank shots of so much shiet that at some point I was loud, and I could see people thinking, why the hell are you yelling? And, aaaand, my mum called me and I was yelling down the phone and she goes “when did you become a shouter?” Faaaaaarrrrkkk.I am so off alcohol. I feel really yukky.
I remember;
- Finally got into bed
- Room is spinning, and my stomach is doing this whirlwind thingie in sync with my head and the room, I hate that.
- Sat up abruptly to stop the spinning
- Lie back down. Spinning continues. Open eyes to stop spinning. Nuthin doing
- Sit up, a-fekking-gain, thinking. I NEED TO PROJERCTILE VOMIT if I’m gonna come out of this alive
- Drink some water
- No vomit in vicinity
- Lie back again, spinning. Sweating. I’m hot
-God please forgive all my sins
- Pour cold water on my face and on my bed. Yes, I was IN BED. Bliss. It was so cold..and nice
- Have to vomit
-Stagger into bathroom. By stagger, I mean I was swinging from one side of the room to the other
- Stop to laugh at my staggering. Tihii, I gat jokes.
- Get to bathroom. Kneel.
-I think I feel like I wanna go.
- Stand, sit on toilet, hold head in my hands
- No go.
-Revert pose, stick head into bowl. Spit in. No vomit.
- Stick effing hand into mouth
- Halelluyha, gag for a minute. God! What did I drink? I vomited evil. It tasted like fuckin cardboard when it came thro my mouth. Y.U.K.K. Was that shite in my stomach?
- Finish. Brush.
-Drink a liter of water
-Get into bed
-I’m freezing now…..UGHHHHHHH! I am not drinking like that again. How could I forget how crap it feels to be drunk!!!! Ugghhhh.
-
I can't think of an appropriate title.
» KenyanMusings Right okay, so I’ve learnt to bend to a few admissions; truths if you like.
Personal truths.
Not the kind of truths I know inauthentically, acknowledge then but somehow manage to do it in a way which forecloses on the truth’s full significance on how I live.
I have a few of those as well..dont we all? Oh, don’t be fronting, you do.
The truths where your existence, sorry, your sorry existence conspires with this evasion and you exist within the confines of ‘average everydayness’ if you may, gradually wasting your life in the self-deception of ‘they’.
Illustration…You light a cigarette and go ‘oh, its just one a day, they who smoke two packs a day are they who die of lung cancer or get bad skin”
For a minute, then you wake up one day and realize that really KM, this habit of yours is nasty…you can’t keep going to the drop hole toilet with your cousins at family parties eti to suck on a guff, eish…so you say ‘ah baby, lose the fags, lose the fags'.
And you do it for months!! Months!!! Until erm, one random day you are sitting with people that are sucking on them cancer sticks (let’s call them as is shall we, ) like it’s the best thing since sliced bread (expression’s sake, I much rather a quarter of block bread thankyouverymuch), and somehow you end up asking-begging-pleading-demanding, in that order, for a puff, I swurr just one…or 20, arrrgh, who’s counting and immediately you are done, you feel like all your good deeds in your past that teetered dangerously close to knocking Mother Teresa off heaven’s list pale in comparison to a rogue politician who just recarpeted the road to the coffee factory, not that we ask, why kind sire now, when for the last 5 years we had to row boats to the factory? But you suspect, it might have something to do with looming elections…I’m just saying.
What challenges haki!!
Oh, did I tell you like how I once sat in an interview and someone asked me what challenges I expect at work and I said errmm….. “None spring to mind”.
Right, ermmm that was not a very nice/clever thing to say, what? It was my first interview ever!! but I can’t help if I don’t see challenges as challenges per se. **assumes lotus** 'I see them as opportunities. '
Needless to say, I did not get the job.
Tihiii. I think they didn’t like me enough.
I think I’ll go to the garden and eat frogs.
I mean, really, challenges are things like accepting football’s place in a man’s life.
Challenge is trying to wrap your feeble mind around how someone would say that the only reason he would not let you have a baby on your own is because *man’s hands fly to face** “You will turn him(the imaginary baby is male, as you can see inequality begins way before conception) into an Arsenal supporter. Oh shucks my life would be ruined!!”
That is a challenge.
You could stand there, perforated notepad in hand and appreciate that it has nothing to do with your parental ability or lack of thereof or just honestly ask, because you know shite about football “who is arsenal”. You may also hyperventilate. Pick your poison. That’s a challenge.
OK! Alright, fine, bending to admissions.
Some you don’t need divine intervention for. Like living in the perfect knowledge that this dude, well friend, well, I dunno, well, Wallace and I are proverbial oil and water. Yaani perpetual conflict does not do it justice. If I randomly said “the earth goes round the sun”, Wallace would oppose it. For sure.
Not that research suggests otherwise but because that is his job. You don’t get it? Closer home, I could say “hi” and Wallace would ask ‘why?” Usually I reply “Go get stuffed you leperous moron”. Well, that reply is not voiced, not all the time….but it plays out thus in my head everytime.
I think I accept. That kind of opposition can only be construed as an absolute difference and distinction between separate identities.
Anywhoo, shall we get to the truth I am accepting?
I’m growing old(er), and very very much in love with a F.A.B.U.L.O.U.S man, another admission I am learning to accept.
I am 25 Saturday, blistering barnacles in a thundering typhoon@!@@#!#$!@!$ this is not right.
**runs to mirror, checks face, checks cellulite, checks stretch marks, checks sagging tits merely a shell of their former perky selves**
Wait!!! Like with tits right? Let me ask.
Does sleeping on your tummy like flatten them out? **feeling of vanity and idiocy takes over KM, but she prattles on** I always get up in the middle of the night, realize I’m sleeping on my tummy and kick myself!!
What? You think I’m vain…talk to my best friend. She absolutely hates pieces of meat with bits of fat. I eat them for her. I love the way the little blobs of fat explode in my mouth and infuse themselves with Ugali. Give me Novocaine haki…that shite kicks rears!!!
Alright, so I’m older, much much much wiser if you ask me, accepting my truths, and accepting that my rights, my wrongs have served to make me the person I am today…and really really loving that.
I dunno what I came to post about. I swear it was NOT about my looming birthday, but anyway,
Come Saturday, I’ll be taking cheques, drinks, chocolates, and gift certificates (for e.g shoes, bags, jewellery, gadgets etc).
No one should buy me a gift because I do not want to trouble you (read I may not like it).
LOL, I know, no one intends to. I’m just saying.
Funny, I know I am so getting none. I am looking into people’s eyes like “you know my birthday is Sato right?’ and they don’t look like they will remember. What atrocity!!
I told my girlfriend, well, gently reminded her, and she went like “f*ck, I know!!” the way she said f*ck is like “bloody hell, does it have to be this Saturday”.
*sniff* you can’t blame me if I was born. If you don't want me jsut say it. Hakuna haja ya kunitesa.
And yes, I know I should stop canvassing because;
**grudgingly assumes lotus and voice of mummy at 10 when there were no balloons at my birthday and aii, me I threw a tantrum, we had fucking ribbons!! Ribbons!! , yeah, the village shop had run out. Like, I could see my classmates looking at me like ‘dooood, is this even a party?**
“ This is a time to be thankful KM, It only matters that you share this day with people who love you. If you don’t shut up I will smack you so hard you will remember that every time you see a balloon”
Mummy!!! Still, mad love for that woman. Mad love.
Copyright © 1999 - 2009 Mashada - All Rights Reserved | Privacy Policy | Terms and Conditions