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• May 19, 2008
• 23:59

  # 9 MAID/ HOUSIE / MBOCH

   » ‎ Stuff Kenyans Like
  
  
  A lot of people hate the word Mboch, or housie - but rhetorically speaking, when two Kenyans communicate about the people who help them at home, they will normally refer to these people as "my housie", "our Mboch" "Mboch wetu" or the "house help"
  
  If there is one thing Kenyans cant do without, I think it has to be a housie. Because labor in Kenya is pretty cheap and the jobs are pretty scarce a lot of the lower income classes have resulted to fall back on taking care of other families for some pay. To some these jobs provide them with the much needed shelter they don't have because most housies will stay in your servants quarters, or if you guys are middle class and don't have a servants quarter you will let her share the guest room down stairs.
  
  A lot of these primitive behaviors were handed down to us by the British Colonies after they left us. They forgot to leave us a manual on how we can survive without a Housie, hence we are stuck and fairly insufficient without a Housie.
  
  Housies are special in their own right, Male housie are even more special. But in as much as I would like to endulge in a conversation of things that distinguish one housie to an ordinary chile I think I will be kind and leave it at that.
  
  However if you used Susana Pomade, or Took a Shower with Rexona and then used the same soap as lotion - then you probably have some Housie tendencies that need to be checked out.

• 16:21

  Kibaki Succession and Politics of Miracles

   » ‎ You Missed This
  Last weekend’s endorsement of Kalonzo as Kibaki’s heir presumptive by Gema may have been the soothing lyrics of a political hymn Brother Steve needed to complete his journey of MIRACLES. If only politics was not an earthly pursuit whose dividends are often directly proportional to your previous calculative investments. But again miracles happen and you need a very big heart full of patients to benefit from such goodies.
  
  Kibaki succession is here with a deafening bang. Forget about all the denials that are nothing but true symptoms of a people whose middle name spells DECEPTION and all its derivatives. Kalonzo will have floods of accolades assaulting his ears in the interim when politically expedient. One only prays and hopes that God-fearing Steve listens to his inner little voice. True to the Jews adage he is a handy sacrificial goat who can be lavishly fattened oblivious of the ultimate slaughter house.
  
  Kibaki and incumbency are the principal threads holding Gema together. Cast your eyes back to Ford Asili-DP days and see the plastic union for what it truly is. The players may be different but the HELL-FOR-LEATHER script remains as solid as before. Only self-deception oiled by blind quest to DOMINATE others at whatever cost blindness can prevent any Kenyan from seeing the impeding tower of Babel following Kibaki’s exit. Well, nobody ever suffered constipation from overindulgence in self-denial.
  
  Loyal marionette
  Look around you and what do you see? Yes, you read that OLD and empty Bantu-Nilote divide here on Kumekucha. And why not? You can as well resort to the old and tested gimmicks of deceptively cajoling others to bend over so that you can have their backs for you eternal ride. Moreover you can even butcher lower primary civics if it can help advance your course. Trust average minds to shamelessly peddle falsehood in rewriting basic history. The unpleasant truth is that such cheap epithets have the unfortunate tendency to bounce on you face with devastating consequences. But again souls devoid of any element of shame will gleefully swim in the same murk oblivious of the stench aand embarrassment.
  
  Just like a boy marvels at a toy believing the contraption is a real nascar, Kalonzo is better advised to fully message his political ego with the endorsements that are made with the singular purpose of not being honoured. The rich calculative history DECEPTION and INSINCERITY is not about to be wiped just yet. Scoundrels will make you smell honey but make sure you don’t lay your hand on the jar. In the long run their objective is superlatively served with you as the willing marionette.
  
  Welcome to political deception extraordinaire made in Kenya for Kenyans. In our shores THEFT is nothing but alternative possession, DECEPTION is reversed industry quest for fairness and equity is envy or laziness exhibited as parroting (DOMO). Speak of immaculately protecting a vice with a golden fence.
  
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• 13:48

  Remembering Malcolm

   » ‎ Black Looks
  Rethabile remembers Malcolm X on Poefrika. It’s an easy day for me to remember as it’s also my son’s birthday. He spent the day looking at some of his maternal ancestors over at the British Museum in London meanwhile here is Rethabile’s post For Malcolm X All you violated ones with gentle hearts; You [...]SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: "Remembering Malcolm", url: "http://www.blacklooks.org/2008/05/remembering_malcolm-2.html" });

• 11:32

  Stuff African People Like: Discussing the Burden of Being African

   » ‎ The Displaced African

  

  Many Africans loves discussing all the way they are being victimized by the world. Whether it’s expressing suspicions that they didn’t get that job, “because they are black,” or “lamenting at how ignorant Westerners are for not knowing the location of their constituency,”, this is one of the all-time-favorite African pastimes, almost up there with church crusades, money chasing and sleeping.

  Don’t be surprised if when sitting with a group of Africans you hear about all the neccesary “points-of-correction” for other races. Among them:

  a) Asian people discriminating Africans in barely audible English.

  b) Indian people calling Africans monkey though they are as dark as we are and have much more hair.

  c) Every Western race wanting to have our skin - tanning-and our hair-dreadlocks, corn rows- and our curvaceousness but making us feel ugly for being who we are.

  d) EVERYONE not knowing the constituency from which they came even though it’s such a famous African constituency that even the Pope should know it.

  The key here is to stay out of these group discussions and shake your head in empathy, sympathy and with absolute disgust (at the foreigners) at all the appropriate times.

  Don’t worry, when the African gets round to complaining about their fellow Africans (another all-time favourite pastime) they will mention you as an example of what African people should be like.

  To learn about more things Africans love to do and discuss stay on the email list or for the more tech savvy, receive updates on your RSS feed reader.

• 8:50

  Xenophobia deflects government failures

   » ‎ Black Looks
  My friend Beauty at “Nigeria What’s New” posted on the violence against immigrants taking place in South Africa and wonders why bloggers in the diaspora are not screaming about this horrible human rights issue since the story broke on May 1st. Good point, Beauty after all if this was happening in Spain, France, Britain or [...]SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: "Xenophobia deflects government failures", url: "http://www.blacklooks.org/2008/05/xenophobia_deflects_government_failures.html" });

• 8:26

  Scangroup AGM

   » ‎ bankelele

  Tags:  Scangroup  

  Scangroup AGM

• 7:30

  CCP Update May 9

   » ‎ Kenyan Pundit

  Tags:  kenyaelection07  

  CP meeting notes Mathare: - Mwangi Kihara, the Chairman of the Mathare United Landlord organization (MALUO) reported that negotiation between Landlords and illegal occupants of houses in Mathare ongoing. So far at least 111 illegal tenants have agreed to leave the houses. KVP (Kenya Veterans for Peace) has been facilitating this process. - It was reported that [...]SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: "CCP Update May 9", url: "http://www.kenyanpundit.com/2008/05/19/ccp-update-may-9/" });

• 3:47

  Yet Another Week III

   » ‎ My part of the world.......

  Tags:  Fun  

  Well since one of our fave M-net Idols outed himself on CNN, I nowfeel free to comment. I have heard that gay men are supposed to have some sense of style but we know those are stereotypes, thanks to Jackson showing up on CNN and M-net Idols (see last Monday's post), in the same scarf and two polo shirts that look so much alike (and are clashing with his fave scarf). Also dude is tripping if he thinks he is going to be living in gay dreamland when he gets to America. He has the perfect trifecta going for him; black, gay and foreign. By the way, as far as I know those camp couselor jobs are seasonal; you go for summer and supposed to go back to your country. So I hope he has a good plan B or his asylum papers ready and even so the Bush government has a poor record in granting asylum requests; wonder why you don't see too many Iraqi refugees around here don't you?
  
  Oh and in the CNN video, is it just me or does the girl who comments 1:26 mins look erm what's the word... developmentally handicapped or for laymen, slow. Then the next chic says " I don't think gay men should have their rights," well if she means that only hot lesbians should have rights; then we agree! Anyway on a serious note it's good to see that the LGBT in Kenya can even have an organisation registered. What I tell people is that even the States is a good example, you can legislate tolerance but you can't legislate acceptance; some things take time.
  
  And in other news, I now know where to go to look for a wife; here I come Namanga! Before I leave, I thought that I had to share this important music video. Women out there need to know the truth what with all this crap in novels and movies about making love all night. Do you know how sore you would be if you shagged for not even 8 hours, lets say 4 hours straight. Making sweet love all night my ass, the person who wrote that song lyric needs to be shot. Anyway here's the video below.......
  
  
  
  Anyhow ya'll have a nice Monday!