To expose the spirit of scoundrels who snap all our breath in sweat as they perfect expediency, we introduce a defection watch column to update readers of Kumekucha on the fluidity of Kenyan politics. And gracing the inaugural post is Alfred Sambu decamping from the party of flowers to squeeze the Orange juice.
For the records Sambu has been a Kibaki’s man since the DP on which he used to whip his Tachoni folks in attempt to dethrone Muskari Kombo. But that is not enough. Sambu’s move to ODM is a ripple on top deep running currents of realignment in the land of Ingo. With Kombo competing to outshine Uncle Moody he is poised to clinch PNU nomination bila sweat. Sambu knows better and as the late Whispers wont to say he is neither naïve nor stupid.
Over the gender fence, madame Orie Rogo-Manduli and Prof. Kamar (Biwott's other wife) have also trouped into ODM. But not so fast. These two maybe more of liabilities than assets. Their value to ODM may not be evaluated outright. Mark you politicians are scoundrels and they don't sleep easy while the 'enemey' is on a roll.
So are these sign of things to come in the next 70+ days? I don’t know but I have the luxury and patience to watch keenly.
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18:32
Defection Watch: Sambu Damps Narc-K for ODM
» You Missed This -
Football Horses that Never Run
» You Missed This The English Premier league is popular the world over thanks to the media blizz. That English football is more talked about than any of its competitor cannot be gainsaid. But a closer look at the game’s dynamics reveals a cleverly-crafted scheme to create heat and media hyperbole from a mute showcase.
Nothing could be further from the truth. British's (read English) appetite to dominate the world in anyway possible remains insatiable. Picture this: Rooney scores a goal from sheer luck and what you read from the headlines next day is no reflection of what you watched either on the pitch or TV. All English footballers are celebrities fulltime. Beckham is threatening his ex-singer wife Victoria and the so-called WAGs (wives and girlfriends) of players even shamelessly apportion themselves fame by association (read sleeping).
Meanwhile the real pitch heroes who 'unfortunately' happen not to be English fade in the limelight of western press. How somebody classifies Rooney together with Gattusso as the world’s most lethal strikers is a dry joke than should be exclusively told by Lucifer welcoming his clients to hell.
Granted, England is home to clubs like Liverpool and Manchester United which are institutions in themselves and no amount of money can buy either history or legacy. But that does not take away the fact that Real Madrid is the world oldest and established club. Kenyans must have watched Brits keenly in backing their respective (political) horses despite all the nauseating warts.
The difference is that the British media hype at least operates within the parameters of civility unlike our naked hatred for fellow countrymen. Unlike football, our politics remains a bloody battle that spares no guns.
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16:55 Are You An Income Generator?
» Kenyanentrepreneur.com I was talking to someone the other day about work in general and how safe (or not) most people’s jobs are and she said that in this global economy, your stability at work all comes down to one question: Are you an income generator? if the answer to that question is no, then your job is not [...]
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Elections 2007: The Kind Of Elections You Should Expect
» You Missed This 
As promised yesterday, I have agonized all night putting myself in the shoes of the incumbent and imagining that I was him seeing State House literally slip through my incumbent fingers before my very eyes as I watch.
By the way this is a very important exercise as it will give us all some very useful insights on what we should expect over the next few weeks leading up to the general elections.
The only thing that would have an outside chance of working would be to clandestinely look for a candidate to sponsor to erode the popularity of Raila and to take away as much votes as possible from the opposition side. This candidate would have to be chosen carefully because it is vital that they do not take any votes from the incumbent. This should not sound so far-fetched because there is nothing that a sizeable media and advertising budget cannot do to get just the right candidate very popular overnight. It would be preferable for that candidate to be young, the kind that would excite the millions of younger voters now firmly in the ODM ship. But of course chances of such a candidate winning would be nil, but remember that the objective would be to put a credible spoiler...
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Kenya Betrayed
» You Missed This 
Chapter 1 - Part 3 - William Kivuvani (Special Branch)
These rumors about me reached such a level that the Special Branch had to intervene and I was asked to come to their office in Mombasa.
Here I met then William Kivuvani for the first time. He was at that time the Chief of Special Branch, Mombasa.. He was also related to Mary and Simon.
We agreed that I should not attend the functions at the Navy Base anymore since he was sure that then all these funny rumors would stop. I understood and accepted.
So Mary started instead to invite some of the American Commanders who had in the meantime also become friends on a private basis. I remember, we once even made a ‘picnic’ party at a drive-in cinema together with Mary’s children…..
During our meeting at his office, Kivuvani had also asked me about my personal background. I told him that I had dual Citizenship (Swiss and German). He was very interested to learn that I spoke besides German and English also French and Italian.
I regarded this ‘interrogation’ as part of his job and did not think much about it especially since I knew that he was not only a relative but also a trusted friend of Mary and Simon.
Kivuvani told me that he had been in charge on behalf of Special Branch to organize the transport of the body of the late President Kenyatta when he died on August 22, 1978, in Mombasa to be brought to Nairobi before his death was officially announced.
But the car broke down in the middle of the road and he had to call the Kenya Navy to send one of their ambulances. Here Simon Mbilu comes in: he was on duty that night and called by Kivuvani (his cousin).
So the body of Kenyatta was changed in the dark at the roadside from car to another and...
Read more
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11:19
Quick Hits: Liveblogging and African App Development
» White African Conference Blogging Guide
Ethan Zuckerman and Bruno Giussani have put together a nice little booklet - a guide on how to live blog a conference. It’s short and informative - just the way I like it. I listen when these guys talk, last time Ethan suggested buying a laptop desk - and I did. What a difference it has made - I no longer have charred legs by the end of the day. On Developing Apps in Africa
Riyaz is an amazingly smart guy and is also the nexus of the growing technologist network in Kenya. Here are a few of his quotes from our multiperson Skype chat where we were debating the need for startup capital when creating a new web application.“Building web apps is cheap. Scaling needs money. But build something good - and you won’t have a problem finding the money to scale.”
“…it DOES take time, effort, dedication …….. but money won’t give you that!!”
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The Monster in Fear of the Unknown
» You Missed This
The plot thickens and political tempo embraces fever pitch as we draw closer to 2007 polls. Ours is real theatre of the absurd politically speaking. Being no game and bereft of all rules, our politics has fallen to its record low. Yesterday’s sworn enemies are now bosom buddies rehearsing their scripts on how best to steal Kenyans’ votes under false and plastic promises albeit packaged in grandiose schemes.
When you see past known looters crafting new alliance with their successors, you know elections are nigh in Kenya. Fear of the unknown and a collective phobia sums it all. As we watch the political theatre, these two dinosaurs will continue holding the remote. We enjoy the actions oblivious of the fact that other interesting channels exist. Our national psyche is enslaved to the so-called tried and tested.
We Kenyans easily get intimidated with age. Some even shamelessly justify such shortcomings by quoting Wahenga who are just but waropokaji hiding under cluster of words (sayings) designed to suit every situation, often conflicting.
Emilio and Moi are now the best of friends like the embarrassment of December 2002 happened in outer space and Uhuru Park is the name of perfume made in Sacho. Make no mistake politics is about playing it selfish under the cover of hollow objectivity. While Baba Jimmy steers the ship to nostalgic waters, Baba Gidi dreads anything abstract or revolutionary. And that provides the hip at which these expired politicians get joined. Kenya's present tokenism economic growth amounts to schooled slavery to the past glory of 1970s as practiced by the present regime.
It will take our national resolve, collective revolutionary mind and heart to wean and win Kenyans out of tokenism and sectarian loyalties. Save for few exceptional CEOs, Kenya's economic glitterati owe all their ill-gotten wealth to politicians. That is why only politics and religion witnesses growth even in gloomy periods. The common thread in both practices is to make people's mind take leave of absence from the brain and instead engage full gear of emotions.
You close your eyes, speak in foreign tongues and shout amen at the drop of a hat. In the process your rumbling stomach is accusing you of being irrational to give out your Ksh. 100 to a gold-bedecked Muiru/Wanjiru. In the end you go back to the office full on air burgers, yawning and defrauding the govt/employer with your sub-optimal output.
Swap the preacher with the politicians and get the true picture. We are in for nasty times and only we can save ourselves, but can we and are we ready for the long haul? You guess right. Meanwhile the flames continue to consume Kenya. Who will save Kenya from her own vultures like the goons they hire to cheat us on hating each other?
Until we chose to think outside the box, we remain boxed and wrapped ready for shipping to political Siberia.
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8:21
Margin Call
» For Love and Money Margin Call
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7:22
Discrimination
» Farmgal So, I finished the book about Grace yesterday and today am faced with an oportunity to forgive. This guy I work with (white) has decided to make me a target of I don’t know what. He decided that the websites I visit (Kenyaunlimited) is palying up with some programs on the comps at work. It all [...]
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6:11
Maxwell:3 Albums 3 Years
» My Life is...Mochalicious! Photo courtesy of Columbia Records via About.com/RnB Maxwell, one of my favourite artists is releasing 3 disks to make an album in the course of three years starting with 2007. Aptly named Black(07) Summers’(08) Night(09), this album is much anticipated. Afterall, it was ‘only’ 6 years ago…….yes, SIX YEARS……since his last album, Now. I have to admit [...]
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5:25
Reform Urgent at Land Registry
» Kenya Imagine It is now two months since I lodged a fully filled application for an official search of a property at the Central Lands Registry,Ardhi House in Nairobi. I have not yet received a certified copy of the official search or title from the Lands Registrar. It is not that the file is missing, and neither is this an isolated event.
Read here as Collins Mbalo highlights the Kenyan land problem. -
Moi's Strange Plan for Kenya
» Kenya Imagine On Madaraka Day in 2002, former President Moi posited that Kenya's problems could not be solved this century. He predicted that Africa would continue to wallow in poverty, corruption, tribalism and disease forever.
Solomon Gakungu advices against listening to the former president. Read more here. -
24hr Shopping in Nairobi
» Kenya Imagine Nairobi is well on its way to becoming a 24 hour city-Nakumatt by Nakumatt. It started a few months ago when Kenya's leading department store made its smaller Ukay branch, a 24 hour supermarket.
Read more from Al Kags here.
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Where Does Your Vote Lie?
» You Missed This
While walking down the street one day a Kenyan MP is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."
"No problem, just let me in," says the MP.
"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."
"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the MP.
"I'm sorry, but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and s! tanding in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people.
They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is having a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are all having such a good time that before the MP realizes it, it is time to go.
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises... The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him, "Now it's time to visit heaven."
So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, b! efore he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.
"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."
The M.P reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders.
"I don't understand," stammers the M.P. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"
The devil smiles at him and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning...
...Today, you voted."
THINK Before you VOTE!!
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3:53
Half hour for Haiti
» Black Looks The day I arrived in Haiti - 13th August was the day after Lovinsky Pierre-Antoine disappeared. His car was found abandonded on the road side and he has not been seen since. Lovinsky Pierre-Antoine is a member of the Lavalas Part and the head of Fondayson Tran Septanm (September 30th [...]
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0:33
:::Elections or Safaricom? What’s with the slump at the NSE:::
» RIBA CAPITAL 
::: Volatile Times at the NSE :::
My take, is that multiple factors are coming into play at the same time.
There is the factor of institutional players (fund managers) crystallizing profits for the third quarter reporting period.
Then there is the heightened political situation as various political heavy weights take to the campaign trail making promises and hitting on their competitors from all angles, this factor affects more on foreign participants and retail investors who do not have any major links or contacts with the various political players.
The third factor but of which is not fully fledged is some investors liquidating their positions in preparation for the Safaricom IPO later in the year if all goes as planned.
The market has taken a bit of a knock, with a significant reduction in trading volumes and market prices after it had appeared to be recovering fully from the prolonged drop in share prices earlier in the year.
But this is likely to improve as fund managers mop up shares at discount prices and consolidate their portfolios. My take is that we should also be taking advantage of this time to buy into the stable and sound companies with a sound dividend payment policy.
RIBA TIP: Consider price to earnings ratio and dividend yield as key factors when taking up positions at this time, when the market is on a bearish run.
:::CFC STANBIC LTD:::
Treasury has already approved the CFC, Stanbic Bank merger and the move will see Stanbic Bank become a wholly owned subsidiary of CFC Bank and under the new entity, CFC Bank will change its name to CFC Stanbic Holdings Limited while Stanbic Bank will change to CFC Stanbic Bank Limited
An agreement signed between the two banks sets out details of the merger through an exchange of shares by both institutions. First, CFC Bank will acquire 100 per cent of Stanbic Kenya and simultaneously the banking business of CFC Bank will be taken by Stanbic Bank, the end result though, will see Standard Bank group of South Africa own 60 per cent of the issued share capital of CFC Group including insurance, stock broking and investment banking units before consolidating both banking businesses into one entity.
I am holding a positive outlook on this share since the new entity should wrestle more business in its various markets which means DTK, CBA, CITIBANK, NIC etc should re-think their strategy since this new entity has all the licenses, experience, and financial backing from its parent to take on virtually any organization in the wider financial services sector in Kenya.
Stanbic is strong on:
Pension Fund management
NGO Banking
Corporate Finance and Investment Banking
Corporate Banking
Embassy Accounts
Strong Financial backing
CFC Group is strong on:
SME Banking
Stock Broking Business
High Networth retail Banking
Fund Management
Insurance Business
Investment Banking (IPO’s, Rights Issues etc.)
Local market knowledge
:::RIBA PICKS:::
I am currently taking advantage of the market slump and below are the shares I hold a BUY recommendation on:
East African Breweries Ltd – To participate in the upcoming Dividend and Bonus issues and more so since this is a blue chip with a very positive dividend policy and hence a drop in prices would leave me enjoying dividends over the period.
CFC Bank – To own a part of a larger and more capitalized group which can leverage the various licenses currently held to become the first complete financial services shop in the country and be a market leader in the various segments.
Stanbic Uganda – To balance my portfolio over this election period and have a portion of it in a foreign land in a company that is enjoying a very strong growth momentum as well as take advantage of the possible merger of the East African stock markets.
South Africa Digest: The JSE (Johannesburg Stock Exchange) is now the largest single stock futures market in the world. And trades in equities futures, options and various other derivative instruments.
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