

Am sure people are expecting a “convoluted” reason as to why the AG decided amend KCA (98) instead of coming up with a brand new Act.
Well, don’t wait for a “huge” explanation, its simple- the AG just thought it was easier to amend instead of coming up with a new Act that may be changed or be altered by insertion of new issues including typing errors.
At least that is what we were told at the stakeholders meeting.
For George Kegoro, ICJ-K head, the present bill is terribly confusing for lawyers and parliamentarians. Kegoro felt that it would have been procedurally easier in terms of practice to bring a brand new statute (through an original Act).
He added that the government can be accused of lack of good faith in this case because it could have been done better.
Assistant Director of Meteorological department Peter Ambenje said some areas will experience a decrease in temperatures which will drop as low as five degrees Celsius at night.
Ambenje said the cold spell would run from this month to August this year.
The Kenya Meteorological Department in its monthly report states;
The Highlands East of the Rift Valley (Nyeri, Muranga, Kiambu, Embu, Meru) and Nairobi area (Dagoretti, Wilson, Eastleigh) are expected to experience cool and cloudy conditions with occasional light rains / drizzle. A few days are expected to be characterized by persistent cloud cover (overcast skies) for long hours leading to extremely cold and chilly conditions with maximum (daytime) temperatures falling below 20°C and minimum (nighttime) temperatures falling below 10°C.
Bollocks to this, I’m off to England.
Any KBWers, bloggers, TEDsters, Skunkers, anyone at all, in my old stomping grounds of Maaaaanchesysta, Lahan’dan (innit),and Awwwwxfod who wouldn’t mind a good discussion over a couple of pineapple juices this week drop me a line.
© Mentalacrobatics for Mentalacrobatics, 2007. | Permalink | 5 comments
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Nairobi
Two of the world’s richest nations - the US and Britain - together rake in more than Sh270 million each year from Kenyans in visa application fees.
And not all people who pay the money end up travelling; many are turned away- without a visa or refund.
And they will have to pay the application fee again if they reapply.
The press attaché at the US embassy in Nairobi, Ms Jeniffer Barnes, confirms that the mission interviews about 24,000 Kenyans every year for all types of non-immigrant visas, most of them for visitors and tourists. About 4,000 applicants are interviewed annually for immigrant and diversity (Green Card) visas.
Ms Barnes says the mandatory $100 (Sh7,200) visa fee “covers the cost of processing visa applications” while an extra $20 (Sh1,440) is a reciprocity fee for a visitor’s visa.
This means that the 28,000 Kenyans who annually apply for US visas pay more than Sh200 million to the US government.
This is a conservative figure because some types of visa attract higher charges.
At the British high commission, press officer Stella Ondimu says the mission does not have records of how many Kenyans apply for visas to travel to the UK every year.
But figures released two years ago showed that the consular section interviewed between 45 and 60 people every working day. If the higher figure were applicable today, this would translate to more than 15,000 applicants each year, paying a non-refundable fee of Sh4,700 each. This would translate to about Sh70 million annually.
Both the British and the American visa fee totals are worked out on a much lower scale than actually collected because the calculations do not take into account that some visa types attract much higher fees.
According to Ms Barnes, the processing fee “is charged because Kenya charges US citizens to issue a tourist visa. Kenya charges US citizens $50 (Sh3,600) for a single-entry, three-month visitor’s visa. Our fee is for a visitor’s visa, which normally is multiple-entry and 12 months in validity.”
The application fee is a requirement of the US law, she adds.
On if the US could consider lowering the fees and if unsuccessful applicants could get a refund, the official says there is no provision in the US law allowing refunds.
The US Congress, she explains, would have to authorise the embassy to refund application fees in case a visa was denied.
Ms Ondimu stresses that “the charges levied are for processing the papers, and whether or not one gets the visa, work has been done.
“Visa fees are set by the government department responsible for visa issuing services overseas. Fees are charged to assist with the costs of processing an application and are fixed globally… the fee is the same regardless of the nationality of the applicant or the country in which he or she applies.”
All people seeking entry into the UK, she points out, must show that they meet the relevant provisions of the UK immigration rules.
But she says the mission does not keep statistics of how many Kenyans enter the UK annually.
On reports that applicants, including senior government officials, are sometimes harassed, Ms Ondimu explains: “Understanding the demands on Kenya government officials and other VIPs, we currently accommodate them with special processing procedures designed to ensure that their visa applications are processed expeditiously.
“Government officials and other VIPs usually use their contacts within the embassy to help facilitate this process.”
On complaints over the treatment of applicants, Ms Barnes denies that consular officials harass or delay the applications of Kenyans seeking to travel to the US.Relevant Links
“A primary goal of the consular section of the US embassy is to provide fast and courteous service to all visa applicants,” she says. “Our customer service survey indicates that we achieve this goal.”
Reminded about the incident in June in which 77 people were arrested but later released without charges being preferred against them, she says they were seized after being found to have engaged in fraud to have their visa applications processed.
“Without going into details, the type of activity engaged in by these individuals was illegal under both the US and the Kenyan laws,” she says.
The arrested people were initially accused of being members of a ring of fraudulent visa applicants.
The frustrations are not peculiar to Kenyans wishing to travel to the US and Britain. But there are other foreign missions whose visa application charges are moderate and in which reports of harassment or other complaints are minimal.
China, for example, which in recent years has proved a popular destination for Kenyans, charges a relatively modest fee - Sh2,500 for the double-entry visa and Sh3,800 for the multiple one.
An official of the embassy’s public affairs department says that although there has not been cases of rejection of applications from Kenyans, a refund of the fee would be guaranteed.
Government-sponsored students are exempted from the visa application fee, the official says, adding that the exemption is part of the two countries’ development cooperation.
But self-sponsored students are expected to pay a token Sh2,200 if they show proof that they agree on the fees charged by the institutions they are going to.
The charge is even lower in the case of Japan for the various categories of visa. And money is not paid upfront, but until the visa is processed when one is asked to pay it on collection, says an embassy official, Ms Oba Kozue.
A single-entry visa, the official adds, costs only Sh2,050, while a multiple one goes for Sh4,100.
She says that the charges are uniform for all categories of visitors, including students, except people on transit who are required to pay only Sh500.
The South African high commission charges no fee to Kenyans wishing to travel there for whatever reason. The country has of late become a preferred destination for Kenyan businesspeople and those seeking medical treatment and further education.
A good turn deserves another, so the old adage goes, and since Kenyan missions treat those wishing to visit the country with decorum, it may only be expected that other countries will reciprocate, says an official at the Nyayo House offices of the immigration department.
There have been many complaints about the US and Britain in particular mistreating visa applicants or denying them entry for no good reason.
For instance, Livestock and Fisheries minister Joseph Munyao early this year came face to face with the grim reality of the frustrations many Kenyans undergo in pursuit of a visa to the US. The VIP treatment he expected was not there, and he was forced to join a long queue of people waiting to have their fingerprints taken and to be searched.Relevant Links
After 30 minutes on the queue, the minister stormed out in a huff.
A public affairs officer at the embassy, Mr Robert Charles Kerr, says that apart from government officials travelling to the US on official business, visa applicants, including Cabinet ministers, are not exempted from the rigid visa security requirements.
Mr Kerr stresses that for security reasons, all visitors to the US embassies around the world, including American citizens, must pass through the security checks.
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Minding your Peepee In Serious Sufferation iN Queues
Another collabo with Guest Blogger
The other day at Tamasha I witnessed an interesting scenario at the kwa watoto. An Aegeus look-a-like galloped into the loos and resorted to peeing profusely amidst a series of chortles, giggles and neighs. His potty training was still intact as he had his trousers down at the ankles (like the young ones do), his colorless thong - worn the wrong way round - clearly visible below his Fundi Frank tank-top. At a certain point, in true dog-to-tree fashion, he raised a left leg and proceeded to sprinkle away unabashedly. It got me thinking about the so called short-call.
Call it what you may: susuing, weeweeing, taking a tinkle in glee, kunyora, sweet release, walking willy wanker, water-gun wars, mkojo mkuu etc – the point is, this is an activity not without its wees woes.
Act I, Scene I - To Pee or not To Pee
That must have been the question William Shakes-his-spear asked himself over and over on shaking his spear having done the deed. His thoughts were on the hassles and hustles:
Arriving at the loo, Inexes discovers a long queue. The urge is urgent and the need of needy proportions. Soon he begins to tiptoe in true ballerina fashion, left pirouette, right pirouette. A series of Masai- and Samburu-like jumps are unleashed with jaw being jutted outwards and upwards with each landing and being recoiled for the next leap. He still has time to take a few snapshots of his belly in the urinal mirror mid-air. “C’mon guys,c’mon!!! Maliza chap chap!!!” Damn, a slight leak and the front of his trouser is irrigated by a few ammonia droplets.
Act I, Scene II- Me I Love Narrow-pee Regardless
“At least let the starter be okay today!!” JM whispers and mutters under his breath, his furrowed brow revealing the inner tension and fear occasioned by previous encounters in crowded loos. He arrives at the urinal simultaneously with three other characters. He thinks of words of encouragement like those he normally hears when Pee-N Speaks.Within milliseconds of the preliminaries the comrades are gushing away in frenzied unison. Unfortunately JM’s NCC fire-station truck has empty pipes and pumps. He squeezes little josh amidst persistent tugs and tweaking to the left and right. Still nothing!!! The comrades are beginning to wonder why he is there… a few self-inflicted, well placed slaps to lil josh and the rivulet begins accompanied by posterior gASSy sighs of relief.
Act I, Scene III – Pablo Pee-Castle
Now, Dooaz Michael-angle-loo loved doodling and sketching in the loo. So he starts the work of art top-down given that pressure is decreasing at an increasing rate. The concentration is intense and the mood somber. Working on the Moaner Pisser is serious stuff. Initial arches are drawn against the dry urinal wall with strokes that are firm and manly. Drat! Running out of paint… The paintbrush is shaken in unison with the natty dreads as the artist withdraws his weapon and retreats from the studio. The incomplete work of art is desecrated and overwritten by the next occupant, Kirima, who unleashes floods of mineral water bottled at source from the slopes of Mt Kirima.
Act I, Scene IV – Pee-bo Bryson ft Peepee and Susu Winans
Having finished the extrication the establishment is treated to a rendition of “a whole new world” (with Archer singing both voices of the duet) marking the relief from release …indescribable feeling... Previous drops at the front of the trouser have since dried. Sadly, placing mshale-junior (MJ) to bed also has it risks. Clamping MJ between the index and middle finger, Archer delivers a series of shakes, shivers and quivers to empty the buffers. Thereafter, the clamp pressure is increased and squeegee-like motions applied forward and backward to ensure no hidden manyunyus and marasharashas remain. Comfortable in the thought that he is safe, MJ is laid to rest and Archer saunters away. "Drat!" There is a cold wet feeling at the tip and evidence of the deed is apparent from the frontal, wet trouser stain.
Act II, Scene I – The Pied Piper of Peepee
Aegeus was always a shy one totally afraid of the loo. The urinal was never his friend. He hated when there were queues. He’d fidget and shuffle in his feet. Other patrons would wonder what his problem was. To him Walking Willy Wonka was a private ceremony just like Wanking Willy Wonka. He always blushed. Overcome by guilt that his behavior was always deemed inappropriate causing undue sufferation durin urination like flatulation during copulation.
Act II, Scene II - Crouching Tiger Hidden Peepee
For starters, he handled his zipper like a delta force tactic. It was secret ammunition to be retrieved under tight surveillance. Like a witness-protection witness in a court of law. Rapid and swiftly. His body so close to the urinal that he was near mounting the porcelain receptacle( after all it had been a while). The nozzle of the small rifle aptly wrapped by foreskin, aptly wrapped by the left hand.
All the while Aegeus looking backward to see if any outsiders have visually infiltrated his peeing ground. Satisfied that his villi in his villa is safe he releases the sphincters.
Act II, Scene III - Pee Free or Die Free
Sometimes overwhelmed by the social bug. The Aegeus sheds his inhibitions and begins to syphon the python proudly. Unzips with one motion. Whips it out in one swing. And spray paints the urinal, like a garden hose to a garden. He breaks all the Urinal Rules of engagement. Makes eye contact with other hoses and waves them hello! Then makes eye contact with the unamused gardener and asks “whassup?!” With a wide crooked smile… and when he finishes shakes his hips in a Shakira-like fashion, and his piece like a bic refusing to write. He swings back his hose into his loin cloth like a belly dancer…and saunters off.
Act II, Scene IV - Hurry Peepee and the Order of the Bladder
It’s a cold day. Needs to pee urgently. Its now or never! The Aegeus shyly rushes to the urinal. Clenching back and front sphincters. Finds a queue. Can’t even stand straight, beads of sweat dripping. Finally he’s next on the urinal. Trembling to find the buttons of his corduroy pants, cursing why he loves buttoned trousers. Struggles to pull the elastic of his too tight ngothas, it’s a tag of war between thumb and elastic. Incoming cold finger causes peepee to retract further inwardly. Peepee don’t like cold. Aegeus can’t find said peepee. He discovers a wrinkle and gently pinches it with his nails, lifting it gently outward and forward…. pulls… pulls only to realise it’s the bean sac and not the bean stalk. Finally the time is here. The mind is willing but the body is unable. There is silence as colleagues behind are wondering what’s the delay. A shy Peepee? He waits for the order of the Bladder. Wait for it…and finally a drop drops…then a floodgate is released. According to Bernoulli’s principle: reduced diameter of the pipe = increased velocity and pressure. The recoil pushes him backwards, as he steps on PeeFlani’s toes, causing Bansusu to burst out laughing….
faced with growing criticism, the ministry of information and communication is meeting stakeholders at Safaripark hotel to get their views on the proposed bill.
here are some highlights of the bill....
One, as drafted the Bill seeks to converge all sectors of communication (broadcasting, telecommunications and information technologies/internet) under one regulatory body i.e. the Communications Commission of Kenya (CCK) and thus, purportedly, streamline the licensing procedures and management of frequency spectrum, through numerous fundamental amendments to an existing principal Act and other incidental laws.
At a glance, this style of law making is clumsy, without precedent in Kenya and indeed the whole Commonwealth. It is the form of law making process that will most likely convolute issues and end up with bad law. Would it not have been tidier to come up with a new law that retains all the required provisions and repeals the existing law?
Since the principal Act, the Kenya Communications Act, 1998, is merely a skeletal legislation that only establishes the CCK, provides for licensing and regulation of telecommunications services, radio communications and postal Services, it is difficult to comprehend the wisdom of using it as the building block towards a law that will incorporate all aspects of broadcasting and information technology.
Again whether having a converged regulatory regime is the most ideal situation or having separate regulatory frameworks for the various communication sectors is to be preferred is a big question and one not easy to resolve without elaborate and structured consultations with all stakeholders and consumers of information – i.e. the general population.
I am yet to figure out how to actually improve the different services provided by my new Nokia N95, and since I am a bit short in time these days, I try to limit my current N95 activities to small issues - discovering new stuff one by one.
What I eventually managed to run as a service is the streaming of video podcast. This service is just sweet as it enables me to download videocasts through a WLAN (@ home & @ work) or GPRS/UMTS (3G) directly from the phone.
==> Whereas an iPod Video still requires some syncing with iTunes + the pysical connection to a host computer (dito the Zen Vision:M I had used for some time), the N95 directly accesses the net. This way, all you need is network coverage and some memory space on your phone (I just ordered a 2 GB microSD card).
My next task will be to figure out how to make screenshots from the phone…